DESPERATE  MEASURES

PART SEVENTEEN:

The storm came again, blasting the island with its brief ferocity. Sid listened to the

rain beating against the shelter, his head down but peering up through his lashes

at Brianna, sitting at the small table reading one of his books. The circle of light

from the lamp cast a warm glow on her face, making her lovely features seem all

the lovelier with its shadows and highlights. He was completely suffused with love

for her, a love intensified because it carried with it not only Sid's own feelings for

her, but those of Maximus at the time he had taken her into the pool. It also bore

in itself the memory of love both lost and nearly lost, Maximus scooping out a grave

in which to lay the charred body of his wife, Sid's of carrying the dying Brianna

down the corridor of his med center. The intensity of his feelings was nearly

overwhelming to him and he rested an elbow atop his knee, burying his face in

his hand.

Brianna, looking up, was startled by the sight of him. "Sid? Are you ill again?"

she asked, concerned, rising and crossing to crouch in front of him.

He kept his palm over his face, not wanting her to see what he knew was so plainly

written there. His continued silence worried her and she reached out her hand,

lightly touching his arm. "Sid?"

Her use of that name seemed to go through him like a heated blade. All in him that

was Maximus now recoiled at the label it indicated, yet he knew that was how she

still perceived him. The fact of that was a physical pain to him and a great shudder

took him.

"Sid?" she said again, having felt his shaking.

Lifting his head, he looked at her with eyes that made her gasp. She saw in them the

look of Maximus as he'd turned back to the scraping of his SPQR.  "Oh...Sid," she

breathed, and her name for him served only to intensify the look.

Standing, he strode to the door and went out into the storm, walking several dozen

yards across the beach and suddenly sitting, both knees bent, hands clasped tightly,

staring at the boiling sea.  Lightning crackled through the sky but he seemed unaware,

his eyes fixed on the crashing whitecaps.

Brianna went to the doorway, watching him. His hair whipped in the wind and rain

ran in wide rivulets down his bare back. She couldn't see his face but knew from the

position of his head that he was staring straight ahead. What was going on with him? 

He was so...different.

They each stayed where they were for the next ten minutes, neither moving an inch.

Then the storm blew itself out as quickly as it had come and she began to walk across

the sand toward him. Shredded palm fronds littered the beach and fresh driftwood lay

strewn about near the water.  The air had about it an almost tangible cleanness. She

approached silently on the hard, wet sand and stood just to one side for a moment,

gazing at him.

He was aware of her presence and lowered his chin so that it rested atop his clasped

hands, closing his eyes. "I am lost, Brianna.  Entirely lost."

She knelt where she was standing, about three feet to his right. "What do you mean,

Sid?"

He laughed, a harsh, sad laugh deep in his throat. "That. That is what I mean."

She didn't understand.  "Sid?"

He lay back onto the sand, shafts of sunlight breaking through the clouds, shining into

his eyes, so he folded both arms over his face, saying nothing.

She slid slightly closer. "Sid?"

Suddenly he rolled onto his right side, fixing her with an intense stare. "Do you not know, Brianna? Have you no idea how much I adore you?"

Her lips parted in surprise. "You...?"

"Yes, Brianna...me! Whoever...whatever...I am. All of it loves you!"

"But...."

His odd laugh came again.  "Yes, Brianna...but."  He sat, wet sand clinging to him,

combing his fingers distractedly through his hair.

There was almost nothing about him that in that moment looked like Sid.  Nothing. 

His hair was completely disheveled, sand covered most of his back and side, and

Maximus was looking at her out of his green eyes, saying he loved her. He was totally,

absolutely beautiful as he sat there. Blood pounded in her veins, almost deafening her.

No, this was Sid, not Maximus.  Wasn't it?

He was looking at her now with such an expression of yearning on his face. "I...remember

the smoothness of your skin in the pool."  His hand came out toward her, stopping,

shaking slightly, not touching her. "And I...ache...Brianna, to know that again.  I...." 

He turned his head back toward the waves, still somewhat wild despite the storm's

passing. "I...," he began but could not say more. Springing to his feet, he sprinted

toward the shore and dove into the surf.

She watched as a giant wave crashed over him, then lost sight of him.  Standing, she

walked toward the water, her eyes searching for some sign of where he was. Where? 

Ah, there. Another large wave was lifting him upwards as it reared toward its crest.

He made it over the top before it broke and she saw him taking long, strong strokes

toward the open sea. What was he thinking? "SID!" she shouted, the wind whipping

the name out of her mouth, back toward the palms. A genuine fear for him clutched

her. Cupping her hands around her mouth, she shouted his name again. Then it hit

her. His name. That was what he'd meant. His name was the problem. He was not

simply Sid any more. Yet he was not entirely Maximus, either. That was why he was

lost. He'd tried to explain to her earlier, but the magnitude of what it must be like for

him hadn't really dawned on her.

After he passed the surf, the swimming was easier and he cut through the water, not

caring where he was going, only that he hoped, in some jumbled way, that he was leaving

himself behind.  He let himself be absorbed in the physical motion of his strokes, in the

rhythm of his breathing.  There was nothing in the world but the lifting, the pulling back,

of his right arm, then his left.  But all too quickly there came a different quality to the

movement of the water around him and he paused, treading in place. The reef. Damn,

he'd forgotten about the blasted reef.  There was a second area of surf just ahead, only

this broke on jagged coral, not on the smooth sands of the shoreline. Inhaling a deep

breath, he wiped a hand across his dripping face, hating that the mindless rhythm of

his swimming had been taken from him.

Something sandpapery brushed against his left leg and he looked down at a large shadow

moving through the water. Oh, God...a shark. For a split second he thought about just

hanging there in the water, letting it come and take him. It passed him, seemed to be

heading away, but then its body began a long, slow turn. Something about that deliberate
turning kicked his survival instinct into gear and he filled his lungs with air, diving slightly

so he could face the shark as it came. For one brief, wild moment his vision filled with a

scene from a movie he'd seen, a torpedo heading relentlessly for the prow of a submarine.

Then the shark was there and he struck out with his fist, smashing it into the tender nose

area.  The shark recoiled, hovered there briefly, then turned and disappeared into the

deeper shadows.

Sid's head broke the surface and he gasped in air, sank a bit, gulped in water, then rose

again, coughing and gagging. His right hand stung like blue blazes and when he could

breathe again, he lifted it. The skin over most of the back of his hand was shredded,

streaming blood.  Red blood.  Fascinated still by that, he watched dribbles of it fall into

the sea, spreading out in small swirls.

For the first time he looked back at the distant shore. Brianna was still there, a small

speck standing on the sand. Brianna.  He began swimming toward her.  Less than halfway

there, he began to realize how tired he was and rolled over, floating on his back to rest.

She was getting a headache from staring at the ocean so long, sunlight reflecting brightly

off the water into her eyes. She tried shading them with her hand, but it didn't seem to

help much. It had been some time now since he'd gotten so far out that she could no

longer discern where he was. What would he do when he reached the reef? If he tried
to swim over it, it would tear him to pieces.  But she stayed there, her eyes scanning

ceaselessly.

Maximus had left his cave after the storm to head inland and paused in the shadows of

the palms, watching silently as Brianna stood near the shore, staring out at the ocean.

He wondered what might have attracted her attention so intensely, but finally shrugged

and headed toward the pond.

Long minutes passed but still she looked for Sid. Something in her was rather amazed

at the degree to which she sought some sign of him, needed to know he was all right.

Then there he was, in the surf again, being almost literally tossed up on the sand like

some bit of flotsam. "Si...!" she began to cry out, then clamped her mouth before the

word fully formed.
 

A large wave deposited him then sucked him back toward the sea. She ran quickly,

grabbing his arm, holding on until he could manage to get onto his hands and knees.

Her hands slid down his forearm as he struggled to get his hands onto the sand to

support himself.  She became aware as she released her grip that her own hands had
come away sticky.  Blood. She had his blood all over them. Biting her lip not to say

his name again, she did what she could to help him get far enough out of the surf to

avoid its pull. His arms buckled and he rolled onto his back, gasping and spluttering

as his chest heaved up and down.

Kneeling beside him, she picked up his right hand, eyes widening at the sight of his

damaged skin.

"Sh...shark," he gasped.

"You hit a shark?" she said.

"Hit shark...yes," he nodded, droplets of water flying from his hair.

"Can you get up?" she asked, determined not to slip and say his name.

"Think...think so," he said, trying to lift his head, which for some reason seemed to

have been replaced with an anvil.

"Here, let me help."  She got behind him, sliding her hands under his shoulders, and

managed to get him sitting up.

Coming around in front of him again, she saw him blink away the droplets from his

eyelashes. He grinned at her rather sloppily.  "Went...went for a swim."

"So I see," she replied, shaking her head. "Do you think you can stand?"

It took much combined effort, but finally he was on his feet, swaying a bit. "I...I think

I'm going to fall down," he announced blearily.

"Not on my watch, mister," she said, determination in her tone, got her arm around

him and began steering him toward the shelter.  Once inside, she settled him on the bed.

He sighed deeply, closing his eyes, his  right hand hanging down, still dripping blood.

"Ok, first things first," she said more to herself than to him, getting a basin of water

and washing the sand and blood from his hand. The abrasions weren't all that deep. It

was more the amount of skin that had come off from contact with the rough skin of the

shark. She applied an ointment and wrapped his hand in white gauze. He had fallen

into an exhausted sleep and didn't wake even as she took a soft cloth and began to wipe

the sand from the side of his face and his neck.

How often now she had seen Maximus asleep and how very like him Sid looked as he

lay there. She smoothed his wet hair back off his forehead, greatly moved by his

appearance, by what he had said to her earlier. She continued wiping the sand from

him, down his shoulders, now across his chest where very unSid-like hair curled damply.

Her womanhood was stirred by touching him and she lay her cheek on his chest, closing

her eyes.

"If only...," murmured.  "Oh, God...if only."

ON TO PART 18

BACK TO LIBRISCROWE

BACK TO PART 16

BACK TO INDEX