MY NAME IS JODI

By Bridgid

My name is Jodi McGregor. I'm twenty years old and today is the last day I'll walk on earth. Do you want to know how I know that? It's simple. I killed a man. It wasn't intentional, mind you, but it occurred none the less and I reckon I've got to pay for it. Do you want to know what happened? Then pay attention because I won’t have time to repeat myself.

Why is it that so many robberies occur around Chrimbo? Could be that people are so desperate for money that they regress into a more barbaric sense of being?

On December twenty-third I walked into bank to cash my piddly-arsed paycheck. The place was a zoo, filled with people who were drawing their last quid out to buy little Tommy a game boy or some shit like that. All I wanted was enough for a diet coke and a cheese sarnie, for fuck's sake. There was enough cash in my pocket for the rent but that was about it. I was next in line when it happened. Three masked blokes came in through the front doors screaming and shouting and shit and the next thing I knew I was lying face down on the marble floor. Some sheila was screaming bloody blue murder and the next thing I knew she was silent. I had no idea what those blokes did to her but something warm touched my leg. Bending slightly, I felt a wave of nausea flow over me when I saw that one of the blokes had cut her throat. Fuck, I wanted to scream, too, but I sure as hell didn't want to meet her fate. I didn't want to die. No matter how god-dammed pathetic my life was I didn't want to die. It took everything I had to swallow back the flood of bile that slapped against my palette but I managed. The rest of what happened was a blur of bullshit.

I heard two men arguing, then there was gunfire. It left my head bloody well ringing, I’ll tell you, and I nearly missed the flash of silver but something inside told me to snatch it. Before I knew it I had a shiny nickel plated nine in my hands and some bloke lounged for it. We struggled, there was shouting, and screaming, then the fucking thing went off. He may have been wearing a mask but I could see his eyes. I could see the life drain out of them, but not before they asked me 'why?'

“I’m sorry,” I said as the man crumpled to the floor. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to…”

“You fucking bitch!” One of the other masked blokes pushed me with his chest and I dropped the gun to the floor. He was so close to me that I could feel the humidity of his voice and I could see a silver filling in the back of his mouth. He waved his gun and raised it to strike me, as I put my arms up to defend myself… the third man stopped him.

“Let her go, mate. Pick your brother up and let’s get out of here.”

“He’s dead, he’s fucking dead! She fucking killed him!”

“Then leave him. We’ve gotta go, mate, or we’re gonna be too late.”

The angry one glared at me for a moment. He looked down at the dead man then back at me again. Spewing words in no particular order, he grabbed me and put his gun to my head.

“Come on! You’re coming with us ...”

I struggled and the other one protested for a bit but he was far too anxious to get away with whatever they managed to grab from the cashiers. He dragged me outside and shoved me into the back of a car. There was an unmasked bloke at the wheel and he looked confused when he saw me.

“Where’s Mick?”  he asked as he flicked his cig out the window.

‘ He’s dead, O’Brien. Now drive, fast!”

I could hear sirens and the bastard pushed my head down onto the seat. I’m not going to lie, I was shit scared. More scared then I’d ever been in my life up to that point, anyway. We were traveling at a high rate of speed and the idiot who was holding me down lost his balance several times. He crushed me up against the car door and somehow my lip got split. I could taste blood. I could feel it run down my chin and I tried to touch it but he grabbed my arm and pinned it behind my back. I guess I screamed or something. It bloody well hurt and the bloke in the front seat got angry, just like he did at the woman in the bank.

“Don’t you hurt her, mate!” I heard him shout.

“She’ll fucking die if I have anything to say about it.”

It was then the third bloke, the one sitting in the shotgun seat spoke up. “Both of you shut your gobs.” His demand was hardly heeded but the exchange ceased when the first bullet ripped through the rear windscreen of the car. Shards of glass flew everywhere. Some of it stuck into the back of my neck and I could see the bloody bits of crystal fall around me as I broke free to brush them off. I heard more shots.

I had no idea where they were taking me but wherever it was the cops were on us like white on rice. This bloke who was driving had his shit together though. While the other two continued to argue he had his nose into getting us the fuck away. I managed to sit up and the wind from the broken window blew my hair into my face but the quick glimpse I got of him showed two significant things. He had big sideburns and blood. There was lots of blood coming from his upper arm. It didn’t seem to affect his driving much. He made a couple of quick rights and then a sharp left and we seemed to have lost them. We, what the hell! Did I just have a fleeting moment of Stockholm syndrome?

Mister sideburns turned us into an alleyway and he slowed the car down. It was then that I figured I’d better speak.  

“What are you going to do with me?”

There was silence and I saw the driver’s eyes in the rear view mirror. He was looking right at me.

“We don’t need her, mate. She’s baggage,” the one in the passenger seat snapped. He seemed to be a kind of ring leader but I’d question his intellect.

“She killed Mick. We can’t let her get away with it, Roddy.” This bloke was sitting so close to me I could feel his body shudder when he said it and it reverberated through me. I just hoped he’d kill me fast without taking any fringe benefits. I don’t think I could deal with it. Anyway I decided it was time I spoke up for myself.

“It was an accident. I didn’t mean to hurt anyone.” The side-burned one looked again and I think I saw pity in his expression. If any of them had half a brain it was him. His eyes said so much. Maybe I had an ally.

“Let her go.”

“You don’t have any say in this, O’Brien. The old man will pay you and send you on your way. Whatever happens to the bitch is none of your concern.” He’d barley blinked.

We were in this seedy section of Melbourne. I’ve passed through the area before but it’s mostly inhabited by immigrants and low income folks. Not that I was anything special, mind you, but I avoided this area because of the crime rate. Go figure, I was tailor made to fit right in now. O’Brien, that’s what they called him, pulled the car into a slot behind a run-down house with a full clothes line in the back yard and several junked Utes. The one in the passenger seat that they called Roddy jumped out first and he pulled me from the back seat, showing little mercy. He was carrying the duffle full of money they’d got at the bank in one hand and he took my elbow with the other, shoving me toward the house. His brother followed, then the driver. When we got into the house there was a man waiting who appeared to be in his fifties. The first thing he asked was where Mick was and when he got his answer he moved to stand in front of me.

He glanced down at the blood stain on my jeans then back up at me. “You killed my son?”

“I..I’m sorry. It was an accident.” I was beginning to sound like a broken record and if the needle was stuck it got a good jarring when the old man gave me a closed fist blow to my face. I saw stars and had no idea what had transpired but I woke up sometime later tied to a wooden chair. I could hear arguing from the adjoining room but the one they called O’Brien was with me still. We were in the kitchen of the house and he was making tea. I moved my foot and he turned to look at me.

“You okay, love?”

“I think so.” Fucking hell, my jaw hurt. “You’re bleeding.”

He looked at his upper arm and shrugged. “It’s nothing. Here, try some of this.” He carried the cup of tea over to me and held it to my lips for me to sip. It tasted good but it was hot and the movement hurt pretty bad.

“Thank you.” My voice sounded funny, distorted.

“Wot’s your name, love?”

“Jodi. What’s yours? O’Brien, right?”

“You can call me Colin. Listen to me. I’m not going to let them hurt you. I promise.”

“Why? You don’t know me. Why?”

“I don’t honestly know, love. This wasn’t my gig and I don’t want any part of a kidnapping.”

Well thank Christ someone realizes it.

“Someone murdered a woman. You’ve got part of a murder, like it or not. This blood on my jeans is, and I was scared. I AM scared.”

His face went white. Neither of the brothers had told him about the woman whose throat one of them slashed and I could see it pissed him off. He drew a deep breath and regained himself.

“Here, take another sip.” He put the cup to my lips again and I gave it a go. Maybe it wasn’t a good time to notice but he was a handsome son of a bitch. His nose was perfectly straight and I couldn’t help but notice his hands. They had rough spots that looked as if he scrubbed them with that pumice soap but there was a certain grace about them. His fingers were thick and I could see he’d broken a knuckle or two but I imagined he could be very gentle. I could tell by the way he held the cup. There was no other way to describe his voice except that it must have been especially tuned for me. Fuck knows why I couldn’t have met him under different circumstances.

“Thatta girl. Jodi, I don’t know if I can get you out of here but I can sure as hell try, love.”

I would have smiled at him because he gave me hope but the sound of something shattering against the wall in the next room made us both look.  The one they called Roddy emerged from the room and he moved fast to knock the tea cup out of Colin’s hand.

“What the fuck, mate.”

“Go home, O’Brien!” Roddy ordered.

“What are you gonna do, mate?”

“We have to get rid of her."

“What do you mean 'get rid of her'?” Colin knew damn well what he meant, I reckon, but he was trying to make him say it.

Roddy began to untie me and I felt desperate, helpless. I looked at Colin and shook my head 'no'. Something triggered him right then and there because he grabbed the gun out of Roddy’s belt and pointed it right at his head.

“Not today, mate.”

“What are you doing, asshole?” Roddy shouted loud enough to bring the other two men into the room. They were both armed. I had no idea what Colin’s plan was but he lunged at Roddy and grabbed him as he held the gun to his head. I moved fast and got behind Colin.

“I’m leaving and I’m taking her with me. You try to stop me and you’ll be an only son.” He was speaking directly to the one who was in the back seat with me. The elder one, the father, stood stoic.

“Toss her keys to the Ute.” Colin nodded toward me.

It was the old man who did it. He reached into his pocket and threw the keys to me.

“We’ll kill you both, you know,” the old man hissed. “We’ll find you wherever you go. You’re a dead man, O’Brien.”

“Maybe so, mate, but not today.” Inching toward the door with Roddy held firm, he herded me with him. The other two men followed at a comfortable distance as we made our way to an old black Ute with silver exhaust pipes.

“Get in, Jodi. Start it up.” …and I did what I was told. It was the only chance I had. I trusted him. He moved to the driver’s side and I slid over. Colin backed toward the open door and without hesitation he whacked Roddy a good one, knocking him unconscious. Shoving the man’s limp body away, Colin moved so fast that we were tearing away before the first shot was fired at us. I don’t know how many they pulled off but once we turned the corner there were no more and luckily neither of us were hit.

“I don’t know how you pulled it off, Colin, but I’m bloody well grateful you did. Where are we going, eh?”

“We are not going anywhere. I’ll take you home, Jodi. Where do you live, love?”

I didn’t answer him right off. It all ran through my mind, my boring life working at a café slinging hash, my two-room flat that I can’t even afford. By now there would be police there as well. He’d be risking too much taking me back there.

“I don’t live anywhere. I reckon you’re stuck with me.”

“No fucking way, love. They’re gonna come after me.”

“Don’t you think they’ll be after me, too?”

He turned to look at me for a moment. I don’t know exactly what went through his mind but the moment we reached the next intersection he turned the Ute onto a road that led out of Melbourne. We were fugitives from a couple of different angles now. Colin didn’t say much for miles. It was starting to get dark now and I could feel the need for sleep tugging at me. I was safe with him; I just knew it, so I let myself go.

It was the glow of a cigarette lighter that woke me. I found myself tucked up against him and I must have been comfortable because I didn’t remember dreaming and at the moment I didn’t feel any fright.

“Where are we?”

“Sorry I woke you, love. Go back to sleep.”

Maybe he avoided answering for a reason. I don’t know. “You must be knackered. Would you like me to drive for a while?”

“Naw, it's okay. There’s a place up ahead where we can stop for the rest of the night.”

He put us on a rutted road that was overgrown from what I could see in the dark. Branches beat against the side of the Ute and tires slipped on the grass-covered surface. When we breached into a clearing I could see a building, some kind of shed. It sure as shit wasn’t a house and I wondered what the hell it was doing way out here.

“What is this place?” I asked as I slipped out behind him.

“Just a shearing shed. It’s been abandoned for a long time. No one will find us here.”

He didn’t pull away when I reached for his hand. It surprised me in a way. I mean he hardly knew me but we did have a common bond of sorts. Once we got inside the shed he lit a small kero lamp and then he lit another smoke. I’ll admit it, the glow brought his handsome face to my attention and I thought of things like how sweet it would be to kiss that mouth of his. The shape of it alone resembled a heart and the glow from the lamp made his eye lashes look so long they were almost unnatural.  He offered one to me and I took it. Maybe it would help settle me some more. Maybe it would turn my mind away from the thoughts I was having. He lit the cigarette for me and I placed my hand on his to hold the lighter still. Honestly, I didn’t want to let it go.

“Tell me about you, Jodi,” he hummed in the voice I'd noticed earlier. Did he know what he was doing to me?

“There isn’t much to tell. The obvious thing about me is that I’m plagued with being in the wrong place at the wrong time. I really meant to get to the bank earlier in the day but it being so close to the holiday and all I reckoned I’d wait until the lunch rush was over. I guess I could turn it around and be optimistic. I probably never would have met you if all of this didn’t happen.”

“Shit. You were in the wrong place at the wrong time. I’m no one worth knowing.”  He wasn’t fishing for anything there. He was sincere.

“You saved my life. Reckon I owe you one for it.”  I couldn’t resist touching him now. Crushing the cigarette out on the dirt floor, I moved close to him and put my arms around him. It felt so damn good when he returned the affection. When I raised my head to kiss his chin he countered and our lips touched. We kissed long and deep. I could taste smoke and sweetness on his breath but most of all I could feel his passion. He had more of it than any other man I’ve ever met. His hand slipped under my shirt and he was just as I imagined. His touch was gentle and tender as he worshiped my breast. A beautiful sound came from his throat and I swallowed it in our kiss. I wanted him; I wanted to make love to him so bad. I was so ready but he pushed me away abruptly.

“You don’t owe me this.” The tone of his smooth voice had been replaced by a low growl.

“I didn’t mean to imply  ...I kissed you because I wanted to, Colin, not because I felt obligated. Can’t you feel it?” It may have been just me. Maybe he found me repulsive. Damned if I’d let him see me cry over it. Okay, I’ll admit it. I did start to well up.

“Fuck, Jodi. I’m just tired. Let’s get some sleep, eh? It’s not you, love, it’s me. I’m no good. Can’t you see that?”

I wiped my nose on my arm and shook my head. “I only know of you what I know of you, Colin, and I like what I see.”

"...and I’m not gonna take advantage of it, love. Come on. There’s some straw over there. We both need sleep right now.”  He was right. We needed to have clear heads so we could figure out where we were going from here. I reckoned that when I kissed Colin O’Brien I also kissed my old life goodbye. So be it.

I woke up in his arms the next morning. Ending up there was probably a matter of keeping warm more then anything but it could also be that he was protective. There was no doubt about it. His eyes were already open when I sat up. He reached into his pocket and shook a cig out of his pack pulling it the rest of the way out with his lips... those lips.

“G’morning.”

He waited until he lit the cig before he responded with a “G’day.” It was then I noticed the wound on his arm was beginning to not look so good. Daylight brings a few revelations.

“We have to take care of this, Colin. It’ll fester and make you sick if we don’t. I have some cash. It’s not much but it’ll get us the stuff to fix you up and maybe a night at a motel somewhere so you can get proper rest. How far is the next town?”

“Thirty or forty, I reckon. Could use some tucker.”

“Yeah, I’m hungry, too.”

“Let’s get a wiggle on, love.”

We were on the road again and figuring brekkie would be the most inexpensive meal we could indulge in.  Colin took us to a road train stop that seemed to be in the middle of the Never Never. He parked the Ute between a large cattle transport and one of those double road trains that scares the shit out of you when they pass you on the road. I guess he figured better safe then sorry when it came to hiding the Ute. We went inside and I made a beeline for the ladies while he found a booth. When I got back we ordered eggs, snags, and coffee. Colin and I got to finish our meal in peace at least before anything happened. After we were done I paid for the meal while he went to the loo to clean himself up a little bit. Not wanting to stand in the aisle I went outside to wait for him. It was only a few minutes before he joined me. He had something tucked under his arm but he waited until we were on the road again before he showed it to me.

“This ain’t good, love.”

It was the morning newspaper and what I saw on the front page rendered me speechless. It was a picture from the bank security camera and it showed me being hauled out of there in the arms of the bastard brother. My name, Jodi McGregor, was printed under the picture and there was a lookout for me. It said they were concerned for my safety and feared the bank robbers may have killed me. I barely finished the article when the sound of sirens behind us sent my heart into my throat.

“Someone must have recognized you, love. They must have called the cops from the diner. It’s okay. I’ll pull over. You’ll be fine.”

“No, Colin! No, they’ll put you away. I won’t have it!”

“Won’t be the first time. I’ll be fine.”

I was so afraid for him that I didn’t think. When I felt him ease off the gas I stepped on top of his foot and we lurched forward.

“What are you doing, Jodi?”

“We gotta keep going, Col. I won’t let them take you. We’ll make it. I know it. Drive!” 

He turned quick to look at the cop car behind us and whatever possessed him to comply with my wishes didn’t matter because he did it. As I looked back I could see the car become smaller and smaller.

“What the hell kind of a Ute is this? It’s fucking fast.”

“Tuned it myself, love,” he responded proudly. So we lost one slow cop but there’d be more. It was inevitable. He was smart, though. He chose roads that were more deserted and less likely to be heavily patrolled. We drove the rest of the day without a single encounter. By late afternoon the fatigue was catching up to us again and we found a cheap motel. We checked in as Mr. and Mrs. Banks with our tongues in our cheeks but the humor was a good sign. I wanted to find a chemist but Colin thought it best that he run the errands. I might be spotted.

I figured I’d get cleaned up while he was gone and as I didn’t have anything to change into I could wash my stuff since we were going to be there all night. They’d be dry by morning. The shower was a little piece of heaven. It washed away the stress-induced sweat and the crap from my mind all at once. By the time Colin got back I was finished and had my self wrapped up in a towel. The sound of the key in the door startled me at first but when he came though it I felt a burst of joy.

“Hey. How’d it go? Did you get everything I asked for, iodine, cotton floss and plasters?”

“Yeah, love, that and then some. Got us a coupla sarnies and cokes. I managed to slip in a bottle, too, just to take the sweet out of the coke.”

“That’s great, Col. Let me clean up that arm then we can eat. Sit here on the bed.” 

It was a little odd how he trained his eyes on me as he set the stuff down. Grabbing the bag from the chemist, he came to me and sat close so our bodies touched. I took the bag from his hands and began to clean the wound but it felt strange to me. Neither of us was talking and I could notice some subtle things such as how he ran his tongue over his lips while he was watching me and how the hair on his neck stood up when I touched him. I caught myself breathing through my mouth and figured I’d better speak.

“Strange as it may seem, I’ve only known you a little over a day but I feel like I’ve known you all my life.”

“Yeah,” was all he replied.

It surprised me when he grabbed my wrist to stop me from applying the plaster to his arm. My first instinct was to struggle but he reached with his other hand and slowly undid the towel I wore. I didn’t want to fight it. I wasn't shy or ashamed to let him see me naked. The look he gave was more then appreciative; it was hard to explain. He tilted his head down and gazed at my breasts, releasing my wrist as he did so. The hand that held my wrist tight touched me ever so lightly and I couldn’t stop myself from covering it with my hand to instruct and mold the shape of my breast.

“You’re beautiful.” His confession made me smile. Before it could reach its full glory he was kissing me. I hardly knew this man. I couldn’t possibly be in love with him, but for that moment in time I was. I was naked and vulnerable; he was there and wanting me. Nothing could stop us. The feel of his mouth pinching my flesh down my neck and over the rise of my breast made my breath hitch and I held it when he stopped to suckle my nipple. His fingers led the way and his mouth followed as he sank from the bed to the floor, perching on his knees to press his face between my legs. He was kissing my sex the same way he kissed my mouth. Probing with his tongue and sucking at my lips. It made me so delirious I don’t even know how I didn’t explode right then and there. He was breathing hard when he withdrew and pushed back to unbutton his shirt but not as hard as I was. I sat up and leaned forward to undo his jeans. I wanted him mother naked, I wanted him inside me. I wanted him, period.

“Please...” Fuck knows why I was begging him. It was obvious he wanted to be with me just as much as I wanted to be with him. His cock was beautiful, straight and proud, dripping with want and it was right there in front of my face. I needed to smell him, to taste him. Burying my face in the coarse curls of hair at his crotch I nuzzled and breathed deep, relishing the feel of his blood-filled prick against my cheek. He wrapped his hand in my hair, tilted my head back and I seized his cock in my mouth, taking him right to the hilt on the first stroke. I could taste the first salty pearls at the back of my throat. The groan that came from him made me shudder.

“Lie back,” he rasped as he grasped my chin with his thumb and forefinger. Colin followed me as I complied, covering me with his weight. I couldn’t help but to press my pelvis against him and as we reclined together I could feel his thick springy cock between my legs. In a fluid move he lifted my leg onto his hip and with a single thrust we were one. My entire being was relaxed and drifting with the exception of the muscles that clenched to hold him inside of me.

When he came I felt as if I’d been wrought with static. There was a snap and tingle as if lightning struck a few bloody inches from me and the flood of fluid he spilled into my belly was warm and comforting. What happened to me was a surprise because he was coming down off his release when the simple sound of his sated moan drew me over the edge. I’m not sure he savored the feeling of my clench on his too sensitive cock but it left us both laughing. We could still laugh and the world was right for now. We made love again during the night between moments of stolen sleep and then again in the morning. Colin O’Brien was by far the best lover I’d ever had.

I think it was about eight AM or so when we finally decided it was time for us to move on. The little bit of money we had left would give us one full tank of petrol and a small brekkie. We had to find someplace to be where no one would notice us but more then that we had to find some way to make enough money to get there.

“Where do you want to go, Jodi? Is there anyplace you’ve ever dreamed of being?”

“I want to be by the shore. Maybe we could work our way west to Perth.”

“We could drive along the coast to Adelaide. Maybe I could get some work as a mechanic along the way, just until we get enough money to keep going.”

“Yeah, Col. I could waitress. It won’t take us long to make it. No one will know us out that way.”

We talked and laughed as we drove along. I don’t reckon either of us noticed him as we got close to the coast because we were entranced by the site of the beach at a placed called Port Fairy. It was so beautiful. The road was wild and winding and we opened the windows to smell the salt air. I could learn to love this freedom; I could learn to love this man. He must have felt it in my gaze but the gaze was interrupted by the sound of sirens. Was it all too good to be true? Were we only allowed to have glimpses of what the good life could be before it was snatched away from us?

“You can lose him, Col. Please, you have to lose him.”

“No worries, love.” So he said but I could see it in his eyes. We weren’t on a straight flat road where we could outrun him and to make matters worse there were more ahead. Blue lights flashed from every direction and even though Colin and I had hope, deep down we knew it was over. He was holding my hand when the patrol car behind us bumped against the fender to send us into a spin. The skid was surreal and slow. I lost Colin’s hand when the Ute began its tumble and it was the worst part of it all. I didn’t hear the grinding, I didn’t feel the pain... I just felt the loss of his hand. 

So here I am. I think he’s taking his last breaths and I want to be alone with him so it’s time for me to end this story. My legs won’t move and I can see flames now. If anyone asks about me, tell them my name was Jodi, but more importantly tell them his name was Colin O’Brien. He was a bloody good man and by the way… it’s Christmas day.

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