CHAPTER 1:

July 23, 2004

I lay very still, staring blankly into space. The reporter's booming, energetic voice on the TV seemed to fill every inch of the hospital room. I didn't want to listen - tried desperately to force my mind to block out each syllable uttered from his mouth. Too painful! His words seemed to be stabbing into me...weaving in and out of my mind...dancing...God, how I just wanted to shut them all out....If only I could! If only...

"Two people believed to be survivors from a plane that disappeared over two years ago, were found yesterday on a deserted island somewhere in the middle of the South Pacific. The couple that found them were said to be cruising nearby islands when they got off course and stumbled across the survivors' island paradise. No word yet on the identities of the two castaways, their condition, or how they came to be on the island. We'll keep you posted later as the story develops...." the reporter trailed off.

Detective Morrow turned off the TV and looked out of the window. Clouds. "Might rain," he thought to himself. He was a big man, graying, fifty-ish. The smell of his Old Spice aftershave filled my nostrils, sickening me even more with each whiff, as he turned back towards the hospital bed.

"So, we got your i.d. from the purse we found among your belongings on the island. We'll notify your family right away and make arrangements for them to come and get you." He paused, and then sat down in a chair next to the bed, lips pursed. Waiting for me to respond, he let out a loud sigh, his shoulders hunched as he leaned forward, elbows on his knees. When I didn’t respond, he let out another sigh, and then sat back, deep in thought.

I continued to stare blankly into space, completely motionless. Tears welled up in the corners of my eyes. "Family…" I thought to myself. "I have no family…not anymore." I shut my eyes, tight. My head throbbed as I listened to the rhythmic beeping of the monitors that were attached to my body.

"You ready to tell us what happened?" he asked, leaning forward in his chair. This wasn’t the first time Detective Morrow had been in my hospital room to question me. In the last 24 hours, I’d seen the man at least twice before, nearly from the moment I had arrived. He just always seemed to be hovering around, asking questions - questions that I just couldn’t answer. Not yet, maybe not ever.

I opened my mouth, closed it. Choosing my words carefully, I thought for a moment. At first, nothing came out. Then, softly, "What did HE tell you?"

Detective Morrow let out a long sigh. "He's not talking either." Pause, then stated, "When reports come out on his identity...well, we can only keep this quiet for so long, you know. You know how the press can be...especially to HIM." Long pause. He stood up, began to pace, let out another sigh. "It would be better for you both...and your families...if you would just go ahead and tell us now what happened - before the press starts speculating and makes up their own version of what happened. Now, tell me, what happened to the plane and how did you get on that island?"

The island...the island....

I rolled onto my side, facing away from the burly detective. "I don't remember," I told him.

I CAN'T remember! I told myself. Don't want to remember...too painful! We had agreed a long time ago not to talk about it. Life before the island didn't exist. Better that way.

Growing more impatient by the minute, Detective Morrow snapped, "I think you DO remember. I think you do..."

I closed my eyes. Tears streamed down my face. Images of memories past flooded my mind. The harder I tried to push them back, the more urgently they seemed to come.

"I don't want to remember!" I screamed inside my mind. "I can't....I can't...!"

CHAPTER 2:

April 22, 2002

I sat on the plane staring out of the window. Late-night flight. The plane was fairly empty. Most people took earlier flights. Others, still paranoid about 9-11, refused to fly.

The coach section was only half full. Mostly businessmen. In first-class, where I sat, I was pretty much alone, except for my best friend sitting next to me, two foreign-looking gentlemen up front, and of course - HIM.

He sat alone, directly across the aisle from me. I could almost smell him, taste him. God he was gorgeous! Even his mix-matched clothes, long black coat, and what appeared to be little animals on his socks made him look hot! Still, he had style, presence.

I pretended not to notice when he sat down across from me. My heart raced.

Don't look at him! I told myself. He won't like it if you stare!

I found myself becoming quite giddy. By this time, the plane was in the air. I decided to look out the window again. Clouds, more clouds. Lots of fucking clouds. I picked up my paperback and pretended to read. My thoughts wouldn't let me actually process the words on the pages of the book in my hand. My mind was racing almost as fast as my pulse.

Happy Birthday to me! I thought. And what a great birthday it had turned out to be, too. First, my best friend, Kate, had surprised me with a trip to Australia, first-class, and now this! Never mind that Martin and the kids couldn’t come along. He insisted that I go on ahead without him and have a great time. And, after all, I certainly could use some time to myself - away from the kids and all of the responsibilities that come with being a wife and mother. Of course, I don't think that Martin would have ever guessed that I would be sitting on the plane lusting after the man sitting directly across from me.

"Here's your drink, Mr. Price," the blonde flight attendant said as she handed him the small glass and what appeared to be a bottle of some sort.

"Thanks, Luv," he replied, giving her a quick smile and nod.

With that, she headed back down the aisle of the plane, and disappeared behind the divider curtain.

God, I love his Aussie accent!  I thought to myself. That man could read the phonebook and make it sound sexy!

Collin Price was Hollywood's latest Australian import. Actor, musician, heartthrob. Seemed to be the trend in the entertainment industry these days. Collin was considered a real Hollywood bad-boy. The tabloids loved him. Hell, everybody loved him. He wasn't just a pretty face - he could act. I mean, REALLY act. Rumor was, he would be nominated for next year’s Oscars.

Maybe he'll make me a member of the mile-high club, I chuckled to myself. I adjusted my seat back a bit and turned my attention back to my book. A second or so later, I suddenly got a strange feeling that someone was watching me.

No, that's silly, I thought. It can't be... I decided to steal a quick look across the isle anyway. Our eyes met!

Oh, my God, he's staring at me! my mind screamed. Deep breaths…that’s it, in and out…

Collin gave me a big smile and a wink. The kind of smile that makes you melt. My heart seemed to skip a beat and nervously, I smiled back at him. Just then, the flight attendant returned.

"Your drink, Ma'am," she said as she handed me the small glass.

"Ah, thanks," I replied as I sat my paperback down on the tray in front of me and took the glass out of her hand. As I did so, I glanced over to where Collin was sitting and caught him take a moment to stare directly at my left hand. His smile faded, replaced with what appeared to be a look of slight disappointment.

Damn! I said to myself, realizing that Collin had obviously seen my wedding band.

At that same moment, I thought I distinctly heard him mutter that oh-so-favorite four-letter word he loves to use so often, "Fuck."

As I once more turned my attention towards him and away from the retreating flight attendant, I felt my own disappointment set in. Collin was now reclining in his seat, eyes closed, baseball cap pulled down over his forehead.

Not that anything could have happened between us anyway, I told myself. I mean, I am very happily married to a wonderful, handsome man. It just would have been pretty cool to talk to him and get to know him a bit.

"Damn!" I whispered out loud to myself. Collin stirred. Did he hear me? I wondered.

"What’s wrong?" Kate asked me, not aware of what had just transpired between Collin and me.

I nudged her with my elbow, motioned toward Collin.

"Oh, yeah, him. I saw him when he first sat down," Kate said very nonchalantly. "Hope he doesn’t cause any trouble on the plane. I might have to take him down," she said, jokingly. "F.B.I. agents are never really on vacation, you know," she giggled, glancing over at Collin.

"Shhhh! Not so loud!" I told her, now blushing. "He’ll hear you!"

Kate stared at me, an evil grin spread across her face. "You like him, don’t you," she teased.

My heart raced. I knew how Kate’s mind worked at times. She loved to embarrass me at any given opportunity. She’d delighted in doing so for years, ever since we first met back in grade school. Here, 15 or so years later, she was still doing it.

Not now, Kate! I thought to myself, quite paranoid that she was about to do or say something that would make me want to hide under my seat for the rest of the flight.

I didn’t have to answer her, of course. She could see it written all across my reddened face. "You do! I knew it!" she squealed with delight. "Well, why don’t you talk to him? Ask him for an autograph or something?"

I shook my head no, trying frantically to keep Kate’s voice level down a notch. "No, not a good idea. I read that he doesn’t really like fans to approach him when he’s trying to relax."

"Well, I can talk to him, if you like?" Kate’s grin widened. "If he gets all pissy about it, I’ll just flash him my badge." She giggled.

"Shhh! Kate, please!" I pleaded with her once more. "Really, it isn’t necessary. This is a long flight, and I’d just rather not bother the man if I can help it."

Kate reclined her chair back, closed her eyes. "Suit yourself," she said, reaching to turn off the overhead light above her. "But, if you change your mind…" she grinned.

"Yeah, yeah," I said, as I picked my paperback up again, trying desperately to disappear into it. "I know, you’d be happy to help me out."

Kate’s grin widened more. "That’s all I’m saying, my friend. That’s all I’m saying."

I looked over the top of my paperback for a quick peek at Collin. He still had the ball cap pulled down over his eyes. I glanced down at a page in my book, then back up at Collin. Oh fuck! I thought to myself. Is he grinning? Did he hear?!

CHAPTER 3:

July 24th, 2004

"We'll be releasing you both in a couple of hours," Dr. Jacobs told me, looking over my charts.

He was a tall, thin man, big nose, glasses. His prematurely grayish hair made him appear to be a bit older than he actually was and his pale skin and bags under his eyes gave the impression that he was coming off of a 36-hour shift at the hospital.

"Released?" I asked. "So soon? Where do I go?" I suddenly became quite upset at the idea that I might be released with no money and no place to stay. I could feel the tears start to fill my eyes again.

Still looking at my charts instead of at me, Dr. Jacobs replied, "That's not up to me. I'm sure you'll be just fine." His total lack of compassion and personality surprised me. "I'll have the nurse bring in the release papers for you to sign." As he opened the door to leave, he ran right into Detective Morrow, who was just entering the room. Apologizing to the burly detective, Dr. Jacobs made his exit.

"So, I hear you'll be leaving the hospital shortly," Detective Morrow said to me as he stood next to my bed. I just stared blankly into space, now feeling the tears run down my face. He was the last person I wanted to see in my room.

"Still not talking, huh? Well, I've been told that your friend down the hall has made reservations for the two of you to stay at a hotel nearby. We'll be sure to pass this information on to your family when they arrive here in the morning." He paused slightly, looking at me as if he were waiting for a response. When he didn’t get one, he continued, "I don't want either of you to leave the hotel until we’ve finished our investigation. There are still plenty of unanswered questions we'd like cleared up."

Still no response. I felt numb.

"Maybe after seeing your family, you'll be ready to talk." Detective Morrow turned and exited the room.

My family...there was a time when I would have given anything to see them...hold them...but that was a long time ago. Things were different now. I was different. Suddenly, I felt panic come over me. What was I going to do? I really hadn't thought about what would happen once I had to face my family after all of this time...after all I had been through. My heart began to race - faster now. The reality of it all was starting to sink in. I felt quite nauseous.

"Hello, Luv! You not dressed yet?"

And there HE was - standing in the doorway of my hospital room. All my worries seemed to melt away. I gave a slight smile, tears still streaming down my face.

With a worried, quizzical look, Collin entered my room. He walked over to my bed, stopped, and held out his arms.

"Come here," he said softly, taking me into his strong, inviting arms. His warmth penetrated my tense body as he embraced me. "It's okay, sweetheart," he softly reassured me. "It's going to be okay...don't you worry...everything will be just fine."

Oh God, how I wanted to believe him - needed to believe him. Still, I cried in his arms for a while longer, the whole while he lovingly stroked my hair and back, telling me everything would work out.

ON TO CHAPTER 4

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