ihavetogoback

I Have to Go Back

The direct continuation of Reflections, Rejections, and Revelations

“I feel so much better. This has been good for me and for Sydney. I can’t thank you enough, Bud.” She snuggled into his arms. Ashley felt safe…almost even felt good after a few days staying at Bud’s house. Almost. The memories of Maximus’ death haunted her too much for true happiness.

Bud didn’t say anything for a while. He simply held her and stroked her hair. It felt good and it was better than anything he’d say anyway. Finally he spoke.

“You don’t need to thank me.” Yep, it would have been better if he’d have kept his yap shut.

Ashley turned and kissed his cheek and then moved back into the comfort of his arms. It became a habit in the evenings once Sydney was down to sleep to sit and talk to Bud. She did most of the talking. Bud was much better at listening than he was at taking compliments or gestures of gratitude. She smiled.

She reached out and patted his cheek before stroking it affectionately. Bud leaned into her touch.

He hadn’t realized how lonely he was until Ashley and her entourage had come to stay. Bud was a crotchety old man. This should be driving him nuts. Instead he enjoyed it. He had the three girls with him, Ashley, her baby Sydney and her nanny, Juana. And then there was the soldier, Dino. It seemed like he suddenly had business at Bud’s house on nearly a daily basis. The fool was in love with Ashley.

Bud was glad he was immune to such crap at his advanced age. Ashley was nowhere near ready to love anyone. She was hung up on her dead husband, the Roman general she’d told him about. Bud saw the look on her face every time she talked about him or thought about him. It would be a long time before she could think about any other man. And when or if she ever did it wouldn’t be an old man like him she’d think about.

Maybe someday she’d love the crazy redhead again. Bud liked Dino. It didn’t mean he thought he was good for Ashley. Bud was very protective of the girl. She’d been through hell thanks to that fuck wad Sid. She didn’t need a man who was flying all over the world jumping in and out of dangerous cesspools rescuing kidnap victims. Ashley needed someone by her side to protect her and take care of her. Sid would be back. The man by her side had to be ready to kill that bastard. Fifty years ago Bud would have been that man.

He folded her into his arms and for one moment it was over 50 years ago and everything else faded. Bud sighed as he breathed in her scent for a moment.

“Don’t you dare say that, Bud. You’re as smart and sharp as anyone I know.” There was a fierceness and desperateness in her tone that surprised Bud. He recognized it for what it was. Hell, he’d been there himself when he lost Lynn, and he hadn’t been young, pregnant and victimized by a freak.

Ashley had a fragile hold on her life and emotions at the moment. It wouldn’t take much for it to all come falling down. She needed Bud. And that was something that Bud could still do. He whispered gently to her while he stroked her hair.

“Don’t worry, Honey. I’m right here and I ain’t going nowhere. I got you.”

“Oh, Bud. Sometimes I’m not sure I can make it through this pain. Surely the heart can’t go on beating. But it has to. For Sydney and for Maximus’ baby.”

“That’s right, Honey. For them and all the people who love you. Until it can be for you again.”

She nodded and fell silent in his arms. Ashley had to tell Bud. He’d understand.

“Um, Bud. You know he’s waiting for me, in the time I left him. Maximus is alive there and waiting for me to return.” She fell silent to wait for Bud’s response. It was immediate as his hands tightened on her arms.

“No fucking way, Ashley! You can’t think about going back there again. Do you hear me?” She turned to look at him. Bud saw the look in her eyes. She sure was thinking about it. The girl could never hide what she was thinking. It was written all over her face.

“I need him, Bud.” The tears slipped down her face. Bud didn’t do so well with women’s tears.

“You need to grieve his loss, Honey.” His gnarled thumb wiped a tear off her cheek.

“He’s dead now, Bud, but he’s always been dead in our time. He lived 2000 years ago. Just because I know approximately when he died, he still has years to live. Years I can spend with him. Years for him to know his baby.” The tears were coursing too quickly down her cheeks for Bud to wipe them all away.

This time travel stuff was just too out there for him. As much as Bud knew it was happening with Ashley and how he met her…he was just too fucking old to wrap his mind around it.

“Damn it, Ashley! You can’t go back there again. It’s too dangerous for both you and your baby.” Bud wasn’t above using either baby as leverage with Ashley. She’d just told him herself that their need of her was the only thing keeping her together.

Ashley was speechless. Bud knew he’d been too harsh even if it was because he was trying to protect her. He’d implied that she would put her child at danger. Had he not learned anything in all the years he’d lived with Lynn? Watching the tears running down Ashley’s face gave him the answer to that question. He’d just implied she was a bad mother if she tried to see her husband again.

“I’m sorry, Ashley. I want to keep you safe. I don’t think you’re thinking clearly about this.”

She was silent for a while longer. Bud knew she was crying, but Ashley even did that without making a sound.

“My life,” she faltered. “Everything has been turned upside down, Bud. All that I knew and believed to be…the normal progression of life and time has been changed by Sid and his involvement in my life.”

“But despite all the difficulty and upheavals I wouldn’t give up any of it to go back to things the way they were before Sid took me. I’d have never met you, Bud. There’d be no Sydney.” A small sobbing hiccup escaped. Bud had to be careful he didn’t squeeze her too hard. He was holding her so fiercely.

“I’d have never met Maximus. The baby growing inside me now wouldn’t exist. I can’t have regrets, Bud. And I can’t go back to living my life from the perspective of what I used to know and what I used to believe. Those beliefs are no longer valid or pertinent to the life I have now. The life where Maximus still exists in a place we won’t be born for nearly 2 millennia.”

Bud nodded again. And this time he thought he really understood what Ashley was trying to tell him. It was crazy. Hell, maybe all of life was crazy in varying degrees. It didn’t change the fact it was too dangerous for her to travel again into the past.

“Honey, I know you love him and you’re hurting right now more than you ever have in your life. I want you to think clearly before you take a risk like that. Wait some time. Keep talking to me and Dino about it. I’ll listen. He will, too.” Bud figured he knew him well enough to say that. He’d go ballistic, but he’d listen.

Ashley nodded. “I will, Bud. I wouldn’t want Maximus to see me this way. He would get to the bottom of my grief. That’s something that can’t happen. He can’t know the circumstances surrounding his death. It could completely change his destiny and the things he will accomplish in his life. I’ve seen him as a general, Bud. He has much to do. Maximus is a great man.” Her love and belief in the man shone in her eyes.

“I’ve thought about trying to change what will happen. It’s a tempting and terrifying thought at the same time. Save him, but at what cost? Could it cause his death to happen even sooner? I can’t play God. That’s wrong and against all I’ve ever believed in.”

Bud was shocked into silence. He had no idea she’d been thinking about this so much. His worry was she’d do something rash, out of grief and longing, yet all along she was thinking and analyzing what consequences her actions would cause.

“I don’t know, Honey. I’ve made a lot of stupid decisions in my life, especially when I was young. Some I’ve wished I could change. But probably I shouldn’t have had the chance to change them. I might’ve fucked things up more the second time around.”

“I don’t know. I suppose something had to make all this.” He waved his hand around.

Ashley knew he meant the world, but she wanted to make him smile. Maybe she needed one, too. “Are you implying He’s your interior designer?” She grinned.

Bud knew that a home was something Ashley was always striving to make and be part of. She’d told him of her life growing up. Her father wasn’t as twisted as his had been, but he was a real piece of work.

Ashley kissed him affectionately. “I love you, Bud. I couldn’t do this without you. You’re the best friend I could have.”

Bud blushed. He was glad he was immune to the charms of a beautiful sweet woman like Ashley. He kissed her forehead.

“If you love an old man like me and call me friend there really must be a God.”

“Oh, there is. I’ve no doubt of it, Bud. Though I wouldn’t need His guidance to tell me what a good man you are.” She grinned at him. “You’re also one of the most modest men I’ve ever met.” Ashley patted his face. “Unusual for such a handsome man.”

“Ha, now I know you’re not seeing right. You’ve seen my Lynn. She was the looker.”

Ashley glanced at a picture on the mantle of the couple when they were young and obviously in love. Lynn was pregnant in the picture. “She was gorgeous, Bud. As are you…in a manly way,” she smiled.

He barked out a laugh in reply, convinced that Ashley was simply too sweet and kind to be a good judge of him as a handsome man. Broken down old fart was more like it.

She sighed. It was obvious Bud was not going to let her give him a compliment about his looks. The handsome man that turned her head more than 50 years ago was still part of him in every way.

“Both Lynn and I weren’t wrong.” She stuck up her hand to halt further protest. “We girls know a handsome man when we see one. You’re going to have to trust me on this,” she grinned. It was fun to tease him. Ashley enjoyed making him blush and smile. It lit up his face when he smiled.

They settled into a pleasant evening together and watched a movie. Ashley liked it. Bud thought it was sappy shit. Some movie called ‘The Notebook.’ Complete fantasy and nothing close to reality. If it was he’d have died with Lynn instead of creaking along like some used up, dried up and worthless thing. Ashley had fallen asleep in his arms after the movie ended. She stirred for a moment. Maybe there was still some use for him.

A baby’s crying pierced the air. Ashley bolted up in his arms and a bedroom door opened.

Ashley yawned. “No, that’s okay, Juana.” She struggled to her feet as Bud steadied her with his hands around her waist. “Next time would be great. I’ll get her.”

He nodded. “Nothing worth seeing anyway.” Ashley was tired a lot. No wonder. She had a small baby and another on the way.

“You better bring her out here.” Bud said it gruffly but there was a small smile on his face.

Ashley’s tinkling laughter retreated as she disappeared inside Sydney’s nursery. The lusty cries of her baby drowned out any other sounds. Juana had closed the door again on her room after nodding to Ashley.

Bud clicked around the TV channels with his remote until Ashley emerged from the nursery with her baby already suckling from her breast. She wiped a tear off the baby girl’s cheek.

“Somebody had huge crocodile tears streaming down her cheeks when I got there. I’m not sure if it was because she was wet, hungry, lonely or a combination of all three.” She sat carefully beside Bud. The greedy, hungry baby didn’t miss a suck as her perfect little bow lips suckled her mother’s nipple.

“Her Grandpa Bud is here to make sure she’s safe and not lonely. Isn’t that right?” Bud’s version of baby talk sprang from his lips.

Sydney’s lips stopped sucking for a moment to focus on Bud before she started them smacking again. Her mother giggled.

“She likes her Grandpa Bud very much.” Sydney stopped sucking again as she focused intently on her mother and giggled a milky grin before smacking her lips and getting back down to the business of eating as she fastened again on her mother’s nipple.

Bud watched, fascinated by both the baby and her mother. When Lynn had their kids in the early 1960’s women didn’t breast feed. It was discouraged. He’d never seen her feed their kids with anything but a bottle.

When Ashley had first fed Sydney in front of him Bud averted his eyes. He didn’t want to disrespect her. But Ashley had assured him that she felt it was something completely natural and she wouldn’t feed Sydney in front of him if she didn’t feel that way.

Bud found something incredibly beautiful when Sydney nursed. The bond between the mother and her child was amazing. He couldn’t describe it…simply felt the power and beauty. Also those feelings he’d had for Ashley more than fifty years ago came back. He wanted to love her and protect her and Sydney. He wanted Sydney to be his daughter and not that fuck wad, Sid.

He shook his head slowly to clear it. That’s when he realized she was watching him. She reached her hand out to touch his knee.

“Your face had such a serene look on it and then it suddenly darkened. Some thought bothered you.” She stroked his knee.

Bud wished she’d knock it off. She read him too easily. This fucking connection between them was too intense. Ashley said it was because of something that fucker Sid had done to her. Bud didn’t believe that shit. There was just something there between them and had been since they’d first met back in the 50’s.

“I’d been thinking of when we first met and then I thought of Sid. He’s enough to give any man a sudden bout of indigestion.”

She nodded and was obviously thinking. “He certainly seems to give all you men indigestion.”

“We all hate him because we see what he’s done to you, Honey.” Bud didn’t add they all hated him because they loved Ashley which made them hate Sid all the more for what he did to her.

Ashley switched Sydney to feed from her other breast. The baby sucked with gusto as she looked up at her mother. Ashley’s eyes were full of love for her daughter.

“Sydney was part of what Sid did to me, Bud. And she is wonderful. I couldn’t ask for something more wonderful than she is.”

Bud couldn’t argue with her on the point of Sydney. It was how Sid went about things and his blatant disregard for Ashley’s feelings if they were contrary to his.

“I’m never going to have warm fuzzy feelings for the shitbird so you might as well stop trying,” he said bluntly.

“Fair enough, Bud,” she smiled at him. She’d never see Sid in the same light as the men. They’d been through too much together. And as upset as she currently was with Sid she still loved him. Sydney slowed on her breast. Her eyes were drooping shut. Ashley shifted her to her shoulder to burp her. She lightly rubbed her back.

Bud watched as she rubbed the baby’s back and began to sing to her. He never got tired of hearing her sing. She was like a sweet beautiful bird. Sydney gave a big yawn and then a burp. Ashley grinned at Bud but didn’t skip a beat as she finished the lullaby to her daughter.

“Maybe we should all get some sleep while she is.” Ashley stood up and fixed her nursing bra and blouse before coming over to Bud. “Sleep well, my good friend.” She kissed him on the forehead.

Bud leaned up and kissed Ashley’s cheek before gently touching a gnarled finger to Sydney’s soft downy cheek. “Sweet dreams.” Bud looked up at Ashley. Life felt good at the moment.

Ashley did have sweet dreams. She woke to the sounds of Sydney stirring, which usually preceded her making other more distressed noises. Right now she was just saying hello to her little world after she’d awoken. Ashley had decided to bring Sydney in with her after saying goodnight to Bud. She had a basinet for her in her room and had wanted her daughter close that night.

She watched her daughter stir. Sydney seemed to be trying to grab her feet. Ashley could understand that. She was enamored by those tiny feet. A grin graced her face followed by a yawn and a big stretch.

“Sid,” she whispered out loud. Ashley had a sudden strong sense of Sid being present. Did the air smell of him?

She slipped quietly out of bed and reached for her robe that she remembered throwing across the bottom of her bed. Only it wasn’t there.

“Sid?” This time she shivered. Was it from the cold or sensing Sid? It was then that she spotted her robe. It was meticulously laid out across a chair. Sid wouldn’t have liked that she discarded the silk and lace garment across the bed. Ashley had been sleepy after putting Sydney down and getting ready for bed herself.

She picked up her robe and brought it to her nose. It smelled of her scent after bathing last night. Was there another or was she being crazy? Ashley spotted the small box on her bedside stand. Her fingers shook as she picked up the satin box.

Ashley opened the box and a slip of paper fluttered to the ground. She gasped at the contents. It was the most exquisite pair of earrings she’d ever seen in tanzanite and diamonds. Before she retrieved the slip of paper she knew they were from Sid. No one else would give her such a gift. No other man was aware of her love of tanzanite and irises. The stones were set so each earring resembled an iris blossom. They’d been custom made by an expert jewelry craftsman.

A shaky finger touched the beautiful stones. The color was brilliant and sparkled in the bedside light. She glanced over at Sydney who was still happily discovering her covered feet.

Only Sid would give her such an exorbitant gift. Her middle name was Iris. They were her favorite flowers. It had also been her mother’s name.

Without thinking she slipped the diamond studs out of her ears and tried on her new earrings. She admired them in the mirror. They were so gorgeous.

What was she thinking?! Ashley quickly removed them and placed them back in the box. These were from the man who made her watch the death of her beloved husband. She picked up the paper from the floor. The script was beautiful and ornate somewhat like Sid.

Of course, his Ashley, his possession. “No!” She spoke emphatically to the room as she stuffed the note back into the jewelry box and snapped the lid shut.

“I am my Ashley. I belong to me, not to you.” She slapped her hand against her chest and spoke fiercely enough to disturb Sydney who gave a slightly distressed cry.

“Ssh, my precious one. Mommy is sorry for her sharp tones.” She kissed her tiny button nose. Sydney’s lips smacked in proximity to Ashley’s breasts.

She giggled. “Ah, I know what you want, my hungry girl.” She untied the strap on her nightgown and let it fall down to uncover her breasts. Her child quickly latched on to one of her nipples and sucked strongly.

Ashley grabbed a burping cloth and settled down on her rocking chair to feed her daughter. She sighed at the turn of events. Her mind was in turmoil. Feeding Sydney always brought her clarity and calm.

Not so for Sid who watched the events unfold on the camera he’d planted in her bedroom on his trip to visit his Ash-lee and bestow on her his gift. He knew his gift had partly succeeded in seducing her back to him. It was a first step. He had decided to forgive her. She had felt that he’d abandoned her with the barbarian Roman.

While that was ridiculous, she had been confused and in distress as well as under duress. Obviously he hadn’t done quite as perfect a job as he’d thought to let her know she was his and his alone. She was still mostly human after all. That produced some flaws for both of them as part of his DNA was also human so he could reproduce with her.

Although Sid had decided to forgive his Ashley he still had anger over her liaison with the hirsute Roman general. He sighed as his finger outlined her breast on the monitor. When he had been in her proximity during the night he’d had an almost uncontrollable need to physically join with her.

If Sydney had not been in the room he’d have gotten in bed with her and taken her whether she had wanted it or not initially. Ashley would have come around; she always did with him. He was irresistible to her, as was she to him.

Sid had withdrawn from the volatile situation. He was perfect and possessed an ability to exercise patience. Sid had infinity to woo her back to him both mind and body. He wouldn’t need nearly that long.

The only unfortunate by product of his and Ashley’s bond and link was the others. He hated them all. They seemed unable to be near his Ashley without trying to possess her for themselves. With each unfortunate journey through his portal one of ‘them’ had been there to both protect her and try to make her theirs.

The idiot cop and sheriff hadn’t succeeded. They had served their purpose to protect her in their times. The barbarian general had succeeded all too well. Only because his Ashley had been vulnerable and felt abandoned had he succeeded. The detestable Roman had taken advantage of her. Sid hated him most of all. Despite his fitting end Sid longed to plunge the dagger in his side with his own hand. That would be delectable, a fitting reminder that there were consequences for touching and taking what belonged to Sid.

Sid had worked himself into a rage again. His attention turned back to the monitor to watch his Ashley and Sydney. They brought him calm and pleasure, yet he was not ready to be around them all the time yet. He had some more things to do first.

“Goodbye, my perfect ones. I will see you very soon.” Sid switched off the monitor to Ashley’s bedroom and then turned it back on to watch again for a moment because he could. He giggled. He felt much better being able to see his Ashley and Sydney again. Sid didn’t worry about the decrepit old cop. He was no threat. The ugly redhead and the decrepit cop would protect what was his with their worthless lives if necessary.

Ashley, too, had been thinking of Sid as she fed their daughter. She knew what the gift meant. Sid wanted her to understand he would forgive her. Again it was a side of Sid she’d not seen before. Ashley knew he loved her though he had a hard time with mutual love. Because he loved her it meant she had to love him and therefore she also belonged to him.

Sid could be so complex at times. Yet his approach to love was very simple, almost like a teenager. She was his first love in human form. Ashley smiled down at Sydney. It had been a wonderful although challenging love and relationship.

“Oh, Maximus. You certainly have added new challenges to my life.” She smiled as she thought about her husband. Ashley loved him so much and yet still she loved Sid in a different way. At that moment she knew she would forgive Sid eventually. He had been striking out at her in his pain from her betrayal. The raw injured feeling Sid had left her with still remained. It would still take more time to heal.

Sid hadn’t abandoned her. He hadn’t known she was gone. Ashley hadn’t left Sid; she’d been very happy. Maximus hadn’t asked for her to be thrust into his life any more than she’d asked to be thrown into ancient Rome and his. And yet all of it had happened and was a very messy triangle that now spanned over millennia.

“What if I can’t give up either of them, Sydney?” she whispered to her grinning baby. “Your mother is a wicked selfish woman for even thinking that.” Ashley felt physical pain in her chest if she considered either man being absent from the rest of her life.

And what about her life span? She’d had some genetic testing done that Dino had sent to a lab using the utmost secrecy and confidentiality. It could never be traced back to her. The results were still pending. Somehow she knew Sid wasn’t lying about this. He had done something to allow her cells to regenerate and deny aging to be more like him.

“Maximus,” she sighed. He was her lover, her soul mate and her husband. What or who had sent her back to him since it hadn’t been Sid? The answer was at the house in Paso Robles. Ashley was going home for the day. She wanted answers and she needed to see Maximus.

She glanced at the clock. It was six AM. It was too early to awaken the household yet. Juana would watch Sydney for the day and Bud would gladly play grandpa. She would make sure no more than 24 hours passed that she would be away from her daughter. Ashley adored having Bud in her daughter’s life. Her own father made it impossible to have him involved in Sydney’s life right now. Bud was the type of man she wanted in that role.

Her only challenge was getting Bud to agree that this was a good idea. And Dino would never agree. Dino would be happy if she never returned to the house or to ancient Rome. Was he overly cautious or was he the one being rational? Dino was smart, savvy and worldly. Ashley knew she was an absolute naïve Pollyanna compared to him.

“Dino is coming with me, Sydney. That’s the way I’ll get him to agree to this.” Sydney agreed with her and clapped her hands together as Ashley finished changing her diaper. She blew a loud raspberry on her rounded little belly which led to more excitement on her daughter’s part.

“He is going to absolutely hate this idea. I’ve got some major persuading to do with both Bud and Dino, Sweetheart. Let’s go get some breakfast for your Mummy. I need to be fortified.”

Ashley hiked Sydney onto one side and was about to leave her bedroom when she felt a flutter in her abdomen.

“Your brother or sister is giving us a morning hello, Sydney. You’re going to have a best friend who will be only a year younger than you. And your mother will get gray hair having two babies only twelve months apart!” Sydney started to laugh excitedly on her mother’s hip.

“Somehow I knew that would greatly amuse you, little girl. You are your father’s daughter.”

Ashley went through the arguments with Bud and then she went through the arguments again when Dino arrived. The decision was Dino would go with her to the house, but there was no journey to ancient Rome. That was Bud and Dino’s final decision.

Which certainly wasn’t Ashley’s final say in the matter. She and Dino argued/debated all the way to Paso Robles in Dino’s SUV. Finally Dino pulled over to the side of the road.

“I don’t know. Are you going and I‘ll hitchhike the rest of the way or call a cab?” Ashley met Dino’s direct gaze with her own.

Dino fell silent. And then the corners of his mouth began to tug into a smile. Moments later he dissolved into hysterical laughter until tears were coming out of his eyes.

Ashley pouted…prettily. Leave it up to Dino to laugh at her when she was being serious. Well, maybe she was a little comical.

“Sure you didn’t. I want to see you standing along the edge of the road in your designer dress and high heels with your thumb out, Ash. And exactly how many times have you ever hitchhiked?” He laughed some more and wiped a tear off his cheek.

Ashley reached out and swatted his arm. “Just because I’ve never hitchhiked doesn’t mean I couldn’t do it. And there’s still the option of a cab.” Her nose tipped up in a way Dino loved when she’d get indignant.

Dino looked around and roared more loudly. “Look around, Sweetheart. You’re more likely to step in cow shit around here than find a cab.” Christ, he wanted to kiss her right now or duct tape her mouth shut. He wasn’t sure which one more.

“They grow grapes here,” she said haughtily. Ashley was not going to concede.

Dino nodded in the direction over his left shoulder. There were some cows in a far pasture.

“Your damned eagle eyes!” she huffed. Dino noticed everything. It was partly why he was so good at his job.

“You must be pissed. Little Miss Sunshine never curses. So what’ll it be? My way or the highway?” He chuckled, all too pleased with himself.

Dino started the engine again. “Okay, Princess. My way.” It wasn’t a question.

Dino nodded and drove again toward the estate in Paso Robles. They’d be there soon. Ashley was the worst fucking liar he’d ever met in his life. She just couldn’t do it. It was why she wasn’t looking him in the eyes right now.

He and the old cop were in complete agreement. There was no way she was going back in time again. And this whole fact finding mission could end in disaster. Sid had broken into White’s house and Ashley’s room last night. He could be waiting for her in the house right now.

Siddy wouldn’t be expecting Dino. And Dino was coming with Smith and Wesson in case Sid tried anything hinky. Dino wished Ashley wasn’t along for the ride, though sparring with her made him feel more alive than he’d been in the last three years.

And for all her feigned irritation Dino knew Ashley was having fun sparring with him. Well, not all her irritation was pretend. Dino started to chuckle.

“Oh, you’re just way too pleased with yourself, Dean. It’s very annoying.”

“They were brilliant. That’s where I got it from.” He chuckled as he expertly turned the vehicle up the road to her estate.

“Obviously the humility and modestly skipped a generation.” He saw her grin as he glanced over at her. She was focused on the road. Her nervousness was betrayed by a nibble on her lower lip.

A sudden warning alert went off inside him. He should turn the car around and drive her back immediately. He had a bad feeling about this. But it was still better for him to be with her than for her to sneak off by herself and come here. He knew how stubborn and determined she could be.

“Fuck!” he muttered. “I don’t suppose you just opened the gates, Ash?” Unless she could do it with her mind that was a useless question since she hadn’t moved a muscle.

He nodded and started to drive through. A really bad feeling. The gates closed behind him. A sensation of being trapped passed through his mind.

Dino drove to the front door of the estate, parked and hesitated a moment before turning off the ignition. He glanced at Ashley, who now looked completely nonplussed.

“I don’t think I told you the same thing happened to me when I came to pick you up last week. The gates opened when I got to them and closed behind me once I drove in. Same with the front door.”

“Those kinds of things happen a lot around here.” Her lips curved into a faint smile. “We don’t have to worry, Dino. No one will hurt us here.” She sounded positive.

Dino felt the reassuring bulge of his gun beneath his jacket. “I’m not so sure, Ash. Stay behind me when we go in the door and by me the entire time we’re in the house.”

Ashley opened her mouth to protest but she saw the determined set of Dino’s jaw. He sensed danger where she felt there was none. It would do no harm for her to comply with what he wanted as they entered her home.

If Dino seriously wanted this visit to stop it would stop. Ashley had no illusions that she could physically bypass him. She’d wanted him to come along with her. Ashley had to make him feel confident there was no danger. That could only be accomplished by him discovering what she suspected was behind all this.

Even if she was right Dino might not feel any more assured of her safety. Ashley knew her theory could be wrong, but she felt they were about to find out the truth. It was the only way she could imagine that Sid had been fooled. Someone had bested him at his own game. There was no way that someone could be human. He’d have detected it much sooner.

Dino nodded and came around to open the door for her. He was a bit surprised she gave him no grief at his request. The SUV was too high for a petite girl like her to easily step out. He lifted her down. Dino didn’t want her jumping down in her condition.

“You hardly weigh anything. Are you eating enough?” He glared down at her. No wonder she didn’t look pregnant.

“Dino, I’m eating everything I can possibly stuff in my mouth that doesn’t come back up. You remember how difficult it was for me in my first trimester when I was pregnant with Sydney. I’ve felt better this pregnancy, but it’s been tougher in some ways since I’m breast feeding this time. My caloric needs are much higher than the first time around. I’m doing okay. I’ll have to set up a conference call with my obstetrician for you and Bud to talk to her and ask questions.” She gave him a wry look.

“I was just asking. The old man asked too, huh?” Dino looked greatly amused by that.

“Yes, Bud asked the same thing several times this week. It’s nice you both care.” She patted his face with a barely suppressed grin tugging at the corners of her mouth. Who’d have thought these two tough men could act like such mother hens?

Dino was glad he didn’t piss her off. He knew he probably crossed a line more than once. He waited as she fished her keys from her purse and held out his hand to take them. Before he got the key in the lock the door opened.

“Fuck that!” He moved Ashley behind him and hesitated. All his senses were screaming at him to leave now. Dino knew better than to ignore his ‘Spidey’ senses. They’d saved his life more than once. Not for one moment did he forget that a pregnant Ashley was at his side. That made for different decisions than he’d make on his own. Just as he was about to say they were leaving Ashley interrupted his thought.

“It’s okay, Dino. I know who or what is doing this. It makes complete sense. It’s the only way Sid didn’t know I was gone. A hummingbird couldn’t have gotten on the grounds without Sid being aware. He’s got every part of this estate wired with advanced technology.” Ashley was very well aware he had her bedroom and bathroom under observation. No one could have that perfect timing as the moments he managed to show up.

Dino knew Sid loved his technological toys. He also knew they were well above the level of anything out there on the market either military or civilian from the time he’d gotten the device analyzed that was implanted in her phone. Future boy had to have a sophisticated computer system running all this. The light bulb turned on in his rusty mind.

“Has to be,” she responded. “Hello,” Ashley called into the house. “Where are you located? May we talk to you?”

“Yes, please enter,” was the reply. “It’s your house, Ashley. I just live here.” The voice sounded amused by his reply and it also sounded like Sid. He would create it to speak in his own voice, she thought wryly.

“C’mon, Dino.” She slipped her hand into her friend’s and stepped over the threshold.

Dino reluctantly allowed her to enter the house with him. This could still be a trick of Sid’s.

Once they were completely inside the door closed behind them. One more barrier separating them from the outside world. Sid had kept Ashley successfully imprisoned here for months. Well, not entirely successful. His thoughts were interrupted by the voice addressing them again.

“Come in to the den, Ashley and Mr. Connero,” the voice practically purred to her. A door opened further down the hallway.

Dino kept a firm grip on Ashley’s hand as he cautiously strode down the hallway. He was on alert though he hadn’t pulled his gun. He visually swept what appeared to be an empty room before allowing Ashley to enter.

“Right here.” A large TV monitor switched on in the room and a face filled the screen.

Ashley had expected to see Sid’s image before her. The image that filled the screen made her gasp. If Dino hadn’t been alert she’d have fallen to the ground as she lost her equilibrium.

Dino could hear the shock and longing in her voice as she saw the man’s image. He picked her up in his arms and set her on a chair. He could feel her clammy hands grasping his arm. She was very pale.

“Ash, stay with me. Focus on me.” Dino patted her face to get her attention. “Slow deep breaths.” Over his shoulder he spit out, “This isn’t some fucking game to manipulate her, Sid. Haven’t you done enough?”

There was silence for a moment. “I’m not Sid. I wouldn’t do anything to damage her. I took this likeness because this is her favorite. I can change if she prefers.” The image morphed on the screen from the bearded Maximus to a clean shaven Sid…except it wasn’t Sid.

“What the hell? Now you look like my partner.” He was nearly identical to Terry Thorne.

Ashley was taking deep breaths and her color was slowly returning. She still had a grip on Dino’s arm. For a moment he considered taking out his gun and shooting the screen. This sure seemed like that asshole Sid to him. Anything he could do to hurt Ashley yet claim he wasn’t trying to.

She sat up straighter in the chair and was almost recovered. Ashley refused to cry though that was exactly what she felt like doing at the moment.

“I’m going to be okay, Dino. Thank you.” She patted his arm and smiled wanly at him.

“I think you should go lie down for a few minutes and then I’ll drive you home.” He wasn’t sounding like there was any negotiation possible. “I’m worried about you, Ash.”

“Yeah, that’s apparent.” Maybe his boot through the screen would be more satisfying than a bullet.

“Really, I’m okay. I was surprised when I saw Maximus on the screen.” She smoothed down the skirt of her dress to convince Dino of her composure. Ashley looked up at the screen and addressed it for the first time.

“Are you the one who sent me to Maximus’ time and brought me back here without Sid’s knowledge?”

The image seemed to preen before Dino’s eyes for her favor. That had to be Sid in there.

“Yes, I sent you to General Maximus.” It was said with confidence and justification.

“He was in need of you. His lineage would end when he died. I knew you would love him and he you. Maximus was worthy of you.”

“Sid wants to monopolize you. You’re not only for him despite his attempts to control and possess you.”

The image shrugged on screen. “I am, but as with Sid I was created with the ability to evolve. I simply lack the flesh that Sid has acquired.”

Ashley thought he sounded like he longed to be flesh as Sid was. Was this how Sid started? She was fascinated by him.

The image sighed dramatically. Ashley was very much reminded of Sid. It morphed momentarily again into Maximus’ likeness to gauge Ashley’s reaction. This time she was more prepared.

“Please don’t do that. I love my husband very much. It’s disconcerting when you make yourself appear to be him.”

“Okay, Ashley. What image would please you most?” It morphed into a young Bud White whom she’d met in 1950’s Los Angeles and again changed to Cort. Ashley had almost forgotten how handsome the young sheriff of Redemption had been.

“These are men I know or have met. They’re unique to themselves. Isn’t there someone I haven’t met whose likeness you could use? That would please me.” Ashley was testing to see if there were others the computer knew about that Sid hadn’t told her.

The computer image became an even younger man than any she had met, who was very handsome with an affable grin and wavy hair. He had a very likable face. Suddenly he was wearing the clothes of an old fashioned pilot. Ashley guessed him to be from about World War II era.

“Gabe. Short for Gabriel.” He changed to an impressive angel, complete with full wings and very naked. He kept the same comely face.

Ashley giggled and averted her eyes. Yes, very pleasing. Then she understood the reference.

“Ah, you’ve become the archangel Gabriel. Does Gabe stand for something else?”

“Yes.” He sounded very pleased with himself. “Great and benevolent entity,” he giggled.

Dino thought he could vomit. He might as well not be in the room. The damn thing was flirting with her. Was it because Sid had programmed it that Sid’s preferences for Ashley had been inserted into the computer’s hard drive?

“It’s nice to finally meet you, Gabe. Sid has kept you hidden away before now.”

“He’s gone and left me alone. And you went away.” He sighed dramatically. “I didn’t see you until last night.”

“Yes, when Sid went into Bud White’s house. I could finally see you again.”

Ashley shot a look at Dino, whose eyebrows were raised. They both understood that Sid had put some kind of device in White’s house to observe Ashley and Sydney.

“Yes, thank you. She is doing very well, Gabriel.” Ashley took a gamble since he seemed so open and without Sid’s guile. “May I make a request?”

“Don’t ever send me somewhere I didn’t request to go. Never again, Gabriel.”

He paused and seemed to be considering it. “Complications arose from your transport to Maximus’ time that I didn’t envision. I agree. Scout’s honor.” He seemed as earnest as anyone could possibly appear.

Ashley didn’t know if she’d convinced him. He was a product of Sid’s genius and duplicity. At least she’d asked him and he seemed to understand that there had been consequences from his intervening.

Sid must have been very upset that his creation had worked against him. This also confirmed that Sid hadn’t known she was gone. Complications indeed! Ashley was living through them now.

She felt rather sorry for Sid. For the first time he’d been played as a puppet instead of the puppet master. It must have been tough for him to swallow. And yet he had. And he still loved her despite what had happened with Maximus. She glanced at Dino.

“One more piece of the crazy puzzle falls into place,” Ashley smiled wryly at him.

Dino snorted in a way only he could. It was full of skepticism, disdain and cynicism all in one noise. Ashley didn’t know why but it just struck her as funny and exactly what she needed to hear. She started laughing until it got to the point she couldn’t stop and tears were in her eyes.

“The hell if I know. If anyone doesn’t understand her, that’d be me.” Christ, now he was talking to a computer.

Ashley stood up and dried the tears from her eyes. She felt fine now and closed the distance between herself and Dino. Looking up at him she wrapped her arms around him and hugged him.

Dino wrapped his arms around her for just one delicious moment and hugged her the way he wanted to hold her. He stroked a hand through her soft hair.

“You got it, friend.” His voice sounded gruff as he struggled to maintain the distance Ashley needed from him.

She stepped back and looked into his eyes. How angry was he going to be with her? Her mind was made up.

Ashley turned away to address Gabe. “Thank you for being honest with me, Gabriel. I’m glad I’ve finally met you. You can talk to me anytime.”

“I’ll like that, Ashley.” He’d morphed into the earnest young pilot again. He had a bouquet of flowers in one hand which he presented to her in his reality.

“Thank you, kind sir.” She pretended to accept the flowers and sniffed them. “They smell divine.”

“Dino, before we leave I need to get a few things upstairs. Did you want a cup of coffee or tea?”

Dino was watching her carefully. Ashley wasn’t behaving at all like herself. Actually she hadn’t been herself since the computer appeared as her Roman general. She’d just settled into her hostess mode. Something was on her mind.

She was distracted. He was joking. “No worries, Ash. Why don’t we grab some coffee for the road on the way out?”

“Oh, okay. Let me just put some on before we go upstairs. That way it’ll be ready.” She smiled at him.

Why was she so worried that he had coffee? She wasn’t intending on leaving with him. This had everything to do with the Roman general. He followed her into the kitchen as she put a pot of coffee on to brew. She pulled a to-go mug out of the cupboard and set it down near the pot.

“I know how that goes, Princess. I’ll just wait upstairs with you so I can carry the suitcase down and get another hernia.”

She stopped to look at him. He’d thrown her off her plan to leave him sipping coffee while she stole away. She actually blushed when she looked at him. Touché!

Dino followed her up the stairs. She looked weary. This day was straining for her though she’d protest otherwise. He’d save her from herself and then maybe she could sleep on the way back to White’s house.

“Somehow it seems odd to be here with everything that has happened.” She walked to a small closet and pulled out a zippered carpet bag. Ashley took a few things from the closet that Dino couldn’t see and quickly put them in the bag.

Ashley crossed over toward the master bathroom. “I just need a few more things in the bathroom and then I’ll be ready to go.”

Dino had been watching her carefully. He knew from what she’d told him that the portal was through the large walk in closet. She hadn’t approached it. Maybe she’d given up the notion of going when he came upstairs with her.

“I’ll wait here for you.” He sat down in a comfortable overstuffed chair. He looked around the room remembering when he and his extraction team had rescued her from Sid. They’d found her huddled in the closet, hiding. Ashley was tenacious and determined. She wouldn’t give up easily.

Over the next few minutes he heard some noises coming from the bathroom. He waited. Finally the door opened. Dino stood up.

Ashley emerged from the bathroom. She was covered by a long hooded black cape. Only her face was showing.

“I have to go back, Dino. I need to see him. When I saw his face today…” She trailed off. “Please understand.”

“I’m sorry you’re hurting so much, Ashley. It’s too dangerous for you. Let’s go back to White’s house now.” He moved toward her. Dino would carry her out of here if he had to. He’d done it once before.

Ashley edged away from him. “Gabriel, now!” The closet door swung open and Ashley dashed inside. Dino nearly had her until the door quickly closed him out. He cursed under his breath. Of course she had the fucking computer helping her.

He pulled on the closet door but it had locked behind her. Dino had no qualms about it. He kicked the door in as the lock easily shattered.

Ashley gasped on the other side. She had finished punching in a key code and the inner portal door sprang open. Dino felt a rush of warm air wash over both of them. She looked at Dino.

“I promise I’ll return soon, Dino.” She turned to leap into the dark opening.

Dino was faster than she was. He was a trained soldier. His hand grasped her arm just as she disappeared into the chasm.

He pulled her to bring her back to his side of the doorway. Instead of his strength easily winning there was a strong pull from the other side that wasn’t coming from Ashley. Dino planted his foot for traction, but he couldn’t hold on. He tumbled into the opening behind her, his hand still wrapped around her forearm.

“Oh, Dino, don’t let go.!” He heard her concern as she called to him as they descended downward.

Dino held on strongly to her arm while he felt a sense of lightheadedness and disequilibrium right before he struck solid ground. He turned his body just enough at the last moment to prevent crushing the much smaller and pregnant Ashley beneath his body as he passed out.

He had no idea how much time had passed. Dino slowly came back to consciousness. His first thought was relief that he still had a strong grip on Ashley’s arm.

Dino felt a sharp prick of something against his neck. It was a knife. His body tensed but didn’t move as he opened his eyes. It was the end of a sword, not a knife. He must be having visual hallucinations.

Before him in helmet and armor stood a fierce-looking Roman soldier, his appearance made fiercer by virtue of the big assed sword he was pressing firmly against the side of Dino’s neck. This day just kept getting better. The hallucination spoke.

Dino thought to look at Ashley, but if he turned his head he figured that would be followed by swift decapitation. It was then he realized how hard he was holding her arm. His fingers released their grip.

Dino waited for the blow that was sure to follow. If her arm looked anything like it did after Sid had bruised her, the general was sure to kill him. Of that Dino was certain. It was exactly what he’d have done.