A CLEAN SLATE

PART TWO:

LONDON, OCTOBER 2002

Terry picked up his double espresso to go from the coffee bar across the street of his office building, and strolled to the newsstand to get his morning paper. While the vendor made his daily remarks about the weather, a poster in the window of a small art gallery caught Terry's eye. He paid for his paper and walked over to read it.

Katharina Heerema. A Clean Slate. Exhibition of Photographs.

Hayward Gallery, London.

The black and white picture on the poster showed the muscular arm and shoulder of a man, leaning over the body of a woman. The image was enlarged; it showed little detail but Terry found the sharp contrast between the male and female bodies extremely suggestive.

Katharina. What were the odds that she had an exhibition in London, that it was her? Then again, what were the. Even if it was her, forget it!

He crossed the busy London road and entered the office building where he took the elevator to the top floor. As always, his secretary was already in and greeted him with a bright, "Good morning, Mr. Thorne."

"Good morning Lisa. Word from Dino yet?"

She smiled at him. "No, but knowing Dino, he has a major headache today."

She was probably right. The day before, Dino had returned home after spending two months in alcohol-free Afghanistan. Most likely, he would have entered the first bar in sight.

Terry went inside his office and sat behind the desk, pulled the lid from his coffee cup and unfolded the newspaper. He browsed through the headlines, skipping through the pages with his usual impatience. He was just about to close the paper, when he caught Kath’s name again on the arts page. He read the small review of her exhibition. Katharina Heerema, Dutch photographer. First exhibition of huge black and white prints. The reviewer called her work 'disturbing and sexually suggestive, technically brilliant and talented.' Overall, it was positive.

Kath had been on Terry’s mind on and off over the last year. And even though he had at the time felt that his actions were necessary, he wasn’t too proud of them. Sometimes he would wonder where they would be now, if he hadn’t pushed her away. He closed the paper and tried to banish the thought of her, like he'd done many times before.

He went through some paperwork, but couldn't concentrate. Dino called, said he wasn't coming in today, didn't feel too great. No surprise there. Finally, after lunch, Terry gave up. He pressed the button on his phone for Lisa. "Lisa, get me the address of the Hayward Gallery."

She came back with it within two minutes. Before another five passed, he was in his car. The gallery was upscale, contemporary. Kath's photographs were displayed over two stark white rooms. They were huge black and whites, featuring a faceless man and woman. The man's body was powerfully built; filtered lighting threw dark shadows on his heavy muscles. The woman's skin was set off luminously against his hard masculine body. The strong contrast and lines seemed to lift the pictures off the walls.

The photographs in the first room gave Terry the impression that the man was protecting the woman. His frame covered her like a shield. The pictures showed different parts of her body wrapped up in strong arms or sheltered by his shoulders and torso. The photographs in the second room told a quite different story, one of sexual dominance and violence. Terry stopped in front of a large image that showed the woman's throat, jawbone, and ear. Dark rope burns marred her skin. The man's mouth was pressed against her ear as if he was whispering to her. Another showed the man's leg dressed in an army boot, his muscles tense, and it looked as if he was pushing down on her buttocks.

When Terry reached the last two, their images hit him in the gut. The first had the small hands of the woman pressed down hard against a wall by the single hand of the man. The second showed her white throat with his powerful hand around it. Terry's instinct told him they were about him and her. He walked around again and even though the pictures were clearly sexual, they saddened and disturbed him. When he turned around to leave he found Kath's huge green eyes fixed on him in shock.

Kath had entered the gallery for a last look before she had to catch a flight back to Amsterdam. She was proud and happy with the results of her work. She had searched for a way to close that episode in her life and had found it, was satisfied that every picture showed what she had wanted to say, without getting into detail.

Terry stood with his back to her, looking at her pictures. Kath recognized him instantly, the way his short-cut hair curled against his neck, his broad back. She felt as if someone had kicked the air out of her and had barely regained her composure when he turned.

He hadn't expected to see her there. She looked beautiful, back to her old weight, nicely filled out. Her dark hair was long again, but the green eyes and soft mouth still weren't smiling. He noticed hard lines in her face that hadn't been there before. He wondered if she was okay. She didn't look happy.

"Hello, Katharina." He walked up to her. Her body was tense, as if she was about to run any minute. He smiled wryly. She had no reason to be glad to see him.

Kath took a deep breath. "Terry." She shook her head, the confusion clear in her eyes. "What are you doing here?"

"I saw the poster and read about your exhibition in the paper. Thought I'd check it out."

Check it out? Why would he want to do that? Her eyes were still on him, searching his face for answers. "I don't understand. Why would you be interested one way or the other?"

Terry knew it wouldn't make sense to her. He gave her his most irresistible smile. "Why don't you have coffee with me? We could talk about why I'm interested."

Kath didn't smile back, just looked at him as if he'd lost his mind. "Talk? I don't think so. I don't have too fond memories of our last 'talk'." She watched him with a mistrustful look in her eyes. "Check it out." Her voice was full of sarcasm. "Well…now that you did, what do you think?"

He turned and looked at the ones that reminded him of their last meeting. "They are quite…. disturbing."

Her laugh was disturbing, too, hard and cynical. "Too fucking right they are. You could hardly expect something nice and romantic, now could you?"

He faced her quietly. "No, I guess that would be too much to wish for."

Her green eyes flashed with anger. "Don't give me that bullshit! You made your point crystal clear." She turned and walked away.

Terry followed her. He didn't know what he hoped to achieve, only knew that he couldn't just let her walk off. He caught up with her outside. “A Clean Slate, Kath?"

She gave him a cold stare. "Still here?"

He didn't answer, just waited for her response. She shrugged her shoulders. "Yeah, well, do you never feel like starting all over again, leaving all that is bad for you behind? I needed a new life, but first I had to get rid of my baggage." She buried her hands deep in the pockets of her leather jacket as if to brace herself.

The gesture was so endearing that he had to suppress the urge to take her in his arms.

She looked him straight in the eyes, daring him. "You were right, you know? Ultimately I wanted you to fuck me. Even when you scared the shit out of me, I still wanted you." She nodded back at the gallery. "It's all in there. Every sordid fantasy. I finally had the courage to face them and get you out of my system."

That was a lie. The moment she had seen him standing there, she knew she wasn't over him. After that terrible night, she'd been sick for weeks, so ashamed and confused. She had quit her job, ready to change her life completely. It had taken her a couple of weeks to work out what she wanted to do. She chose to go back to school, and had been over the moon when the Academy of Arts accepted her.

And now he was here. His blue-green eyes were observing her with care. Showing….what? Interest? Concern? It didn't make sense. Why did he have to come here and rake it all up again? The way he looked at her made her weak inside. She felt the tears burn behind her eyes. "I can't do this…"

Terry stopped her from running, held her by her elbows, not daring to hold her too close. "Kath, please, let me explain."

She shook her head in despair. "No…no."

He looked at her pleadingly. "Kath, I couldn't be your knight in shining armor. One day you would have woken up and found that I was just a guy...and you would have hated me for it."

Her face showed her confusion. What was he saying? Had it been a charade, for her benefit? She wasn't buying it. "Oh, no, don't give me that! That was not about me. Who was it? Ex-girlfriend? Ex-wife maybe? You've been hurt before? Well, so have I. Shit happens, hasn't anybody ever told you?" She started to cry. "Let me go....."

He didn't want to, forced her to look at him. "Don't run. Talk to me."

She tried to free her arms from his iron grip. "No. I can't do this, please...."

Terry pulled her in close, let go of her elbows, and put his arms around her. Kath froze. He held her, gently stroking her hair with one hand until he felt her relax against him. Kath's emotions ran haywire. She'd wanted to kick and scream, but standing here, inside the safe circle of his strong arms, she realized this was where she wanted to be.

He took her face between his hands, lifting it. "If I call you, will you talk to me?"

With the last of her resistance, she shook her head. "No."

He lowered his head until his lips were touching hers.  He kissed her softly. "Will you talk to me?"

The kiss confused her even more. "No... Maybe…I don't know."

She wanted him to kiss her again, but he didn't, just sighed deeply. "Okay, fair enough, I'll call you and we'll see." He let go of her and she ran.

NOVEMBER 2002

Terry waited a week before he called her. He had wanted to give her some time and needed to get things sorted in his head first. She had been right. The excuse he had used hadn't been about her. He had been afraid, and even though he would like to think that his concern for her had been genuine, he had to admit that his own fear of getting involved and starting something on the wrong basis had probably been his first motive. He realized that if they were to have any chance at all, he would have to be honest with her. She had developed a great bullshit detector; he wouldn't get away with half-truths.

Kath was sitting on her bed, reading. It was about eleven at night when the phone rang.

"Hallo, met Kath."

"Hi, Katharina."

The deep voice went straight to her core. He called! She had been waiting for it ever since he told her he would. She'd been trying to make sense of it all. Last year he had pushed her away hard and now he wanted her to believe that he hadn't meant it. There had always been a little doubt in her mind over his behavior that night. It didn't mesh with the tenderness he had shown the night before. She had been so fucked up, afraid that her brain was playing tricks on her, and had dismissed the doubt as wishful thinking, told herself to stop hoping for the impossible. Now he was back trying to…what? Get into her life? She was confused and nervous.

Terry waited for her to respond. She was quiet but at least she hadn't slammed the phone down. He said, "It's not too late for you?"

Kath found her voice. "No. I never go to sleep this early. It's okay."

He smiled silently. She was talking. That was a start. "What are you doing?"

"I'm sitting on my bed. I was reading."

"What are you reading?"

"To Kill a Mockingbird."

"Oh, yeah, great book. Great movie, too."

"I've never seen the movie."

"You should. It's really good."

The quiet way in which he made conversation calmed her nerves. "What are you doing?"

He sighed. "I'm still at the office."

She tried to imagine him sitting there, behind a desk, maybe with his long legs stretched and his feet on the desk. "Do you always work so late?"

"No. Well, sometimes. I needed to get some paperwork done."

"Are you still with Luthan Risk?"

"No. Dino and I have started our own company."

"Dino?"

"Yeah, he's my best mate. We used to work together before." He paused, decided not to hold back. "In fact, he was there when we pulled you out. He was the one who contacted your father."

Kath sucked in her breath hard. He'd admitted it! She tried to remember the men that barged into her prison. She couldn't. What was left was an impression of power and violence. "Oh…Somehow I don't see you running an insurance company."

He chuckled. "Hmm. No, not bloody likely. We are for hire as negotiators, or consultants... whatever the client needs."

"Guns for hire?"

He was quiet for a moment. "Yes, that too."

She realized that he was being honest with her, giving her a chance to ask him whatever she wanted, things she had been wondering about for over a year. "Don't you ever get sick of all the violence?"

"Yes, sometimes. However, it's what I do. I've been doing it for the best part of my life."

"How do you become a kidnap and ransom negotiator? I mean, I never even knew the job existed."

"I was recruited."

"Recruited from what?"

"The army. SAS."

Special Air Services. "Of course, I should have known that you were a soldier." She paused. "Did you kill my captors?"

She heard him taking a deep breath. "Yes."

"Good."

Memories were coming back to her. She was quiet for a while. She heard him light a cigarette, inhale, and blow out the smoke.

"Kath?"

"Yeah, still here. Did they always deserve it, the people you've killed?"

"Yes."

"So it doesn't bother you?"

"It never used to. You don't stop to think when someone is pointing a gun at you. But…" He hesitated.

"Yes?"

"I killed a boy in Iraq. He would have killed me, but he wasn't much older than my own son. That bothered me."

A son! Then there must have been a wife, maybe there still was. "You have a son?"

"Yes. He's seventeen."

"Seventeen! You must have married pretty young."

"Yes, I was 21 when we got married."

"Are you still?"

He heard the hesitation in her voice, as if she was afraid to ask. He smiled inwardly. "No. We were divorced seven years ago."

She felt a rush of relief going through her body. "Are you still friends?"

He laughed sharply. "No. We were never very good at the friends bit."

"Oh. I'm sorry."

He dropped his voice. "Are you really, Kath?"

Jesus! What was he doing to her? She felt her cheeks burn, thankful that he couldn't see her. She wasn't going to answer that. She tried to imagine him as a father, but didn't quite manage. "Are you close to your son?"

He sighed. "No…no, I'm not. I wasn't a very good father, or husband for that matter. I wasn't around enough. I really don't know my son. When we meet, he's always very … polite."

She could hear the pain in his voice. "That must be hard."

"Yeah. I can't blame him. I wasn't there when he was little and now that he's almost a man, he doesn't need me anymore."

"It must have been hard on your wife, too, not having you around."

The bitter laugh again. "So she keeps telling me. But she's a general's daughter. She knew the life."

She thought of the risks he took. "Did it ever go wrong? I mean… did you ever get hurt?"

His heart jumped at the worry in her voice. "Yeah, it happens. You can't do what I do and not get hurt sometimes. Nothing major, though."

"You were shot?"

He evaded that question. "I'll show you my battle scars sometime."

She heard his deep laugh. Was it suddenly hot in here, or what?

One question she had to ask. "Terry? What happened that night? Were you pushing me away on purpose, or am I just imagining things?"

"No, you're not. I was. I was afraid to get involved with you. I felt that with everything that had just happened to you, and the way you seemed to be depending on me, we didn't have much of a basis to start something." He paused. "But I didn't want to admit that my own fear of being hurt again had a lot to do with it. I didn't think we could make it work."

She wasn't responding. "Kath?" He could hear her breathe in deep.

"And now? How do you feel now?"

"I would like us to try. The point is, you have never been completely out of my thoughts. Not since the first time I saw your picture."

That threw her. "My picture? What picture?"

"The picture Dino had in your file. I guess he got it from your father. It was a portrait of you smiling and happy."

She knew what picture he meant. Her father used to have it on his desk. She had always liked it herself; it had been taken in happier times. "I think I know the one you mean."

"The truth is when Dino came with the assignment, I didn't want to go. It was your picture that made me go."

She closed her eyes. She was so overwhelmed that she couldn't speak.

"Kath? What do you think, luv?" His voice sounded worried.

What did she think? Her voice was hoarse when she finally spoke. "I don't know. I was so hurt. You scared the shit out of me. I felt ashamed, confused and…humiliated. I thought I had worked you out of my system, but the moment I saw you again I knew I'd been lying to myself."

She heard him let out his breath hard, as if he'd been holding it. She suddenly felt very shy, didn't know what to say. He was the first to speak. "What are you saying, luv? Is that a yes?"

Her voice was no more than a whisper. "Yes, it is."

He felt a heavy load being lifted from his heart. "We are going to work this out, luv." He chuckled. "I'm very happy you didn't slam the phone down on me."

Kath smiled. He could hear the smile in her voice. "I am too."

They were both silent for a while. Kath felt quite drained. He heard her stifle a yawn.

"Are you tired, baby?"

"Yes, I can hardly keep my eyes open."

"It's late. I'll go now. I'll call again tomorrow, okay?"

"Yes."

"Sleep tight, luv."

"Yes, you too."

* * *

He called her every night for a week. They talked about everything imaginable, his work, Dino, his plans for returning to Australia one day. Her study, her struggle to get her life back. His son, his hopes for him. They talked about important matters and trivial ones. About movies, books and music.

Kath had always loved his voice; now she loved lying in bed, propped up against her pillows and just listening to him. He made her laugh a lot. He just loved hearing her laugh. When she did, he imagined her as she had been in the picture, with happy eyes and a gorgeous smile. He enjoyed teasing her, was aware of the way she reacted to his voice. He loved to turn her on.

"I went back to see your photos again."

That surprised her. "Really? Why?"

"Because of what you said. That they were your fantasies."

He didn't say 'about me'. The thought of him going back there with that knowledge, made her feel a little embarrassed. "Oh…. what do you think now?"

"Do you want the truth?" He was doing that thing with his voice again.

"Yes, of course."

"They turned me on."

Whoa! Kath felt her heartbeat pick up a pace. He laughed low and, oh, so sexy.

She smiled shakily. "You like doing that, don't you?"

"Doing what? What am I doing to you, luv?" He knew exactly what he was doing.

"Confusing me."

He giggled. Such a surprising sound; she loved it.

"It's not what I would like to do to you most." He deliberately turned her on with his voice, every word was like a caress. She had trouble keeping her breath regulated.

"Baby?"

"Hmm."

"What are you wearing?"

"Just a big shirt I sleep in, why?"

"Just because. I like to imagine how you look sitting there."

"Actually, I'm lying down."

He got a vivid image of her on the bed, her long bare legs, her breasts firm under the shirt, her nipples hard, pressing against the fabric… He whispered to her, "I wish I was there with you. I want to touch you."

Kath felt the heat warm her whole body, the longing for him painful. "Oh, Terry."

"Close your eyes, luv."

She closed them. His voice in her ear told her what he would do to her. She could feel his hands on her skin, feel his mouth and tongue touching her most private places. Her breath quickened; she wanted him so badly.

"Do you trust me?" His voice was low and intense.

"Yes."

"Do you want me?"

"Oh, God. Yes!"

"I need you so badly, baby. Touch yourself for me…"

Her eyes flew open. What?

He heard her suck in her breath hard. "Kath … close your eyes; just imagine that I'm there with you…"

She closed her eyes again. Slowly her hand went down over her body.

"What are you doing now?"

She told him, imagining that the hand caressing her was his. She could hear him breathe heavily, envisioned him there, doing the same. She wanted him so badly it physically hurt. In detail, Terry whispered all the things he wanted to do to her. His low rumbling voice drove her closer to the edge.

"Oh, God! Terry!" She moaned in his ear, so close now.

"Yes baby, come for me…"

The wave came and took her away, again and again, like the surf tumbling up on a sandy beach, until she cried out.

She heard his hoarse voice, heard how close he was. "Oh, fuck! Yes! Christ, Kath...I want you..."

Feeling both satisfied and lonely, she waited for her breathing to come back to normal and said, "Come to me. I want you here for real."

He sighed deeply. "I would love to. But I'm leaving tomorrow with Dino."

"Oh. No. No." She didn't want to think about what he was going to do, couldn't stand the thought of him being in danger. "How long will you be gone?"

"Not sure; could be one week or a couple of weeks."

"Can you call me from there?"

"No. I don't think so."

She hated it, but wouldn't whine about it. "Okay. I understand. Just get here as soon as you can. I will be waiting for you."

"Okay, darlin'. Go to sleep now," he soothed. " I'll see you soon."

AMSTERDAM, DECEMBER 2002

Kath was running. She pushed her limits, enjoyed the endorphin rush. She was thinking about doing the Rotterdam marathon next year, or maybe even New York. When she reached the road she lived on, she slowed down a bit and regulated her breathing to her slower pace. On the stairs that led to the 17th century mansion in which she had her apartment, she did a few stretch exercises. Then she ran up the stairs and went inside, never noticing the man who observed her from the window of the café across the narrow canal.

Terry finished his coffee. He had tried her house, but she wasn't in. As it was freezing outside, he decided to wait in the little café across the road. The table at the window was free and he'd waited for her return on the edge, silently smoking and drinking one coffee after the other. Thank Christ the Dutch had a liberal attitude towards smoking in bars. He'd seen her come running over the old brick bridge and slow down as she reached her house. He would give her half an hour. She would probably be in the shower right now. He lit another cigarette and inhaled impatiently, his imagination running away with him.

Kath wasn't dressed when the bell rang. She put on her bathrobe, and rubbed her hair dry with a towel as she opened the door. The sight of him on her doorstep left her speechless. She silently stepped aside to let him pass and closed the door behind him, leant against it. The look in his eyes made her heart beat like mad.

Terry stared at her, at the deep V-line of her robe that disclosed her décolleté where little drops of water came together and formed a tiny stream down her cleavage. Her arm, holding the towel half in the air as if she'd forgotten what to do with it. The disheveled mass of wet curly hair, and finally at her mouth and eyes that were telling him how much she wanted him.

He had been hurt. There was a little cut above his left eye and she reached out and touched it gently. Terry moaned, dropped his suitcase, and grabbed her. He pushed her against the door, kissing her hard, with a fierceness that left Kath boneless. She was completely lost. His hard body ground against hers, his hands slid inside her robe, stroking her bare skin. She climbed onto him, her legs around his waist. She pulled at his coat; he had on too many clothes. She wanted his skin on hers. He pinned her against the wall with his hips and started taking off his coat, jacket, and polo. Kath wriggled her arms and lost the robe. She pressed her breasts against his chest, moaning aloud at the sensation of finally feeling him. Somehow he managed to drop his jeans and boxers. He lifted her with his hands under her buttocks and entered her in one swift move. All the desire he had repressed for over a year, all the bottled up emotion came out as he buried himself in her body. This wasn't about tender foreplay or gentle exploration; this was about needing her so bad it hurt. Her soft body enveloped him as he banged her against the door with deep, desperate thrusts.

Kath couldn't believe how good he felt. The real thing surpassed all her fantasies. This was the only purpose for her body; she was made to make love to him. She held on tight, her arms around his neck, her hands grabbing his hair, looking down on his face. His head tilted back and his eyes closed, as he totally concentrated on the feel of her. She kissed him, let her tongue flicker in and out his mouth, sucked on his lips. He moaned hard, opened his eyes and looked at her. She was going over the edge. The orgasm exploded inside her, every nerve in her body focused on one thing.

Terry saw her eyes roll back, heard her scream his name, felt her inner muscles contracting. Mindlessly he forced himself deeper and deeper inside until he felt the excruciating ecstasy search for a way out. His whole body stiffened and he roared as he filled her with every thrust.

He kept her up against the door, his face buried between her breasts. She held him close, one hand caressing his hair, the other moving over the muscles of his back. When his ragged breathing calmed, he looked up at her with glazed eyes and a drowsy smile on his face. "God! I needed that," he murmured. She kissed him passionately, her body ready for more. She slid down to the floor and waited for him to pick up his trousers before she pulled him with her, to the warmth and comfort of her bedroom.

Kath couldn't get enough of him. As a lover, he surprised her constantly. He could be anything she wanted him to be, tender and loving, dangerous and dominant, hard and passionate. There wasn't a place left on his skin she hadn't touched, hadn't tasted. She loved his body, his hard rippling muscles under the velvet skin, the soft hairs on his chest and abdomen, his long powerful arms and legs, his big feet. She had a special thing for his armpits; she loved to bury her face in his sweaty hair and lick up his sweat. He was ticklish and wriggled and laughed when she did that. She loved the little moles under his arms and next to his nipple. She loved his hands and mouth; he drove her crazy with what he did with them. He could turn her on with his voice, his eyes, or the slightest touch.

Kath cried when she found his battle scars. She noticed some of them at once and traced his entire body searching for the rest. He had many: bullet wounds, jagged knife scars, and a lot of others caused by what he called "flying debris". He tried to make fun of them but Kath was too upset. He had to take her in his arms and rock her gently until she calmed down. The obvious evidence of the risk that his work held induced immense fear into her heart. She made passionate and desperate love to him afterwards. In making love to him, she had found a completely new way of communicating.

Terry had never had a lover like her. He thrilled at the way she responded to him. She was always ready, never too tired or shy. Trusting him completely, she was all his. He loved to explore every secret her luscious body held for him, loved the red flush on her cheeks after love-making. But most of all he loved the way she looked at him in the morning, and he knew that he wanted to wake up next to her for the rest of his days.

* * *

Terry lay flat on his back, out cold. Kath was on her side observing him. His hair was a little longer; it curled around his ears and against his neck. Her fingers trailed down his forehead, the bridge of his nose, lightly touching the sensual bow of his full upper lip. She caressed the 24-hour stubble on his cheek and ran her fingertips down over his naked chest. She admired the light brown hairs shining golden in the orange glow of the fire, slowly moving her hand over his abdomen. He was so beautiful she wanted to cry. She cuddled closer to him, her head on his shoulder, one leg crossed over his. Kath closed her eyes, happy now.

When she woke up, Terry was watching her, one hand slowly stroking the length of her back. He turned on his side and took her in his arms. He kissed her forehead, the tip of her nose, nibbled on her upper lip, slowly, leisurely.

Kath chuckled as he softly bit her neck. "Are you hungry?"

"For you, all the time…" His face settled between her breasts.

Kath pulled at his hair, made him look up. "No, seriously, shall I make us breakfast?"

The look in his eyes told her breakfast would have to wait.

* * *

Terry stretched languorously and threw his legs over the side of the bed. He took a cigarette from the pack on the side table next to Kath's luxurious double and lighted it. He walked over to the windows and opened the curtains, letting in the pale December sun. Kath's bedroom was on the second floor of the town house. The window gave him a great view over one of the oldest parts of Amsterdam with its canals and large mansions. Her apartment occupied two floors. The living room, dining room, and kitchen, where Kath was preparing their breakfast, were on the first floor, her bedroom, darkroom, and guestroom on the second.

Terry loved her apartment, with its spacious rooms, ornamental ceilings, and tall stained-glass windows. It had large wooden floorboards and fireplaces, all original features that dated back to the 17th century. It was a very luxurious house, with walk-in wardrobes and marble bathrooms. Her kitchen would make the average hotel manager covetous and her darkroom was fitted with professional equipment. But Kath had furnished the house in a minimalist way, every piece picked with care for either comfort or functionality. In her bedroom the huge antique double and side tables were the only pieces of furniture. Apart from a large rug in front of the fire and a big flat screen TV above the hearth, she had left it empty. In the living room one huge wall was completely covered with bookcases and the only other pieces were the large comfortable sofas flanking the fireplace and an antique cabinet where she kept the booze and glasses. When he'd first walked in and remarked about the space, she had laughed and said she liked 'room to move'. And despite the absence of little trinkets and knick-knacks that most people use to personalize their homes, Terry found her home extremely personal and appealing.

In the bedroom, Terry put another log on the fire before he disappeared into the bathroom for a leak and a quick shower. Kath could call him down for breakfast any minute.

* * *

On the fourth day, Kath took Terry for a walk around the city, showing him all her favorite places. Because he was always cold, she bought him a heavy leather coat and woolen toque and shawl at the flea-market at Waterlooplein. It made him look like a criminal and she loved it. They went to the Dam and fed the pigeons, took a long walk through the Vondelpark and did their shopping at the famous Albert Cuyp market. A drink in one of the age-old pubs at the Rembrandtplein and a walk home through the canal district completed the tour.

Terry was glad to be back inside. He immediately put some more logs on the fire in the living room and made himself comfortable on the couch in front of it, basking in the gratifying heat of the fire. Kath had to laugh at him.

"You're hopeless. Why you ever chose to leave Australia for Europe is beyond me." She'd opened up a bottle of Burgundy and passed him a glass. Terry took her free hand and carefully pulled her on his lap.

"I plan to go back there one day." He put his glass on the floor and cupped her face with his hands. "Would you ever consider living there?" he asked, his face intense.

Kath's eyes wandered over his face, taking in the serious ocean-green eyes, the soft mouth, the strong jaw, all the features she loved. "I would consider living anywhere with you."

He sucked his breath in deep and kissed her, whispering against her lips, "Wouldn't you miss home?"

Kath pushed him back gently and looked into his eyes. "I love you. You are my home."

Terry took her glass and put it on the floor next to his, freeing her hands and taking her down on the couch until she was under him. "And I love you." In the way she had come to love so much, his lips came down on hers, gently sucking them in before becoming more urgent and demanding.

Under her shirt, his hands stroked her back and sent shivers up her spine. He slowly unbuttoned the shirt and put his mouth on her bra, softly biting her nipples through the satin. Kath hands moved from his hair downward over his strong neck and shoulders. She moaned and shivered in pleasure. Terry raised himself from the couch, picked her up in his arms and with a few long strides, he carried her up the stairs and into the bedroom.

* * *

It was the day before Terry had to leave on another assignment with Dino. He didn't volunteer much information about the job and Kath was too afraid to ask. She tried very hard to keep her worries to herself, but Terry knew that she was upset. Although she never said so, he could see it in her eyes, hear it in her voice and feel it in every touch. They were on her bed, watching the news. Terry sat with his back against the pillows, Kath between his legs, her head on his chest. He hugged her extra close with arms and legs. She turned her head and listened to his heartbeat. She wasn't a very religious person, didn't believe in the Bible or the institution of the church, but now she sent silent prayers to her own personal God. Please, protect this man. Send him back to me safely. She closed her eyes and kept listening to the strong steady beat of the heart she loved so much.

When Dino came to pick Terry up the next day, Kath finally got the meet him. She opened the door and he looked at her with total astonishment.

"Jesus fucking Christ!"

Kath raised her eyebrows at him.

"You are that Katharina! Where is the son of a bitch?"

He stomped past her and had a go at Terry. They frolicked like a couple of boys, although Kath did think some of Dino's punches were a little too hard for fun.

"You could have told me, you bastard!"

Terry didn't look too guilty. "Hey, mate, none of your fucking business."

Dino turned to Kath. "Sorry, honey. I just never expected to see you again."

Kath smiled at him. "Yeah, I know...never get involved with a package."

Dino grinned back. "He told ya, did he?"

Kath hugged him. "I'm happy I finally have a chance to thank you."

Dino hugged her, too, his arms oddly gentle until Terry gave him a punch in the back and growled. "Hey mate, find your own sheila."

Kath excused herself to make coffee. She liked Dino, could see that they were good friends. It eased her worry about Terry a bit, knowing that he would have Dino to look out for him.

When it was time for them to leave, she held Terry tight. They had said their goodbye's before Dino came. He took her face between his big hands and kissed her softly.

"I'll be back before you know it."

She just nodded, her throat too tight to respond.

At the door Dino said softly, "I'll look after him, I promise."

And they were gone.

ON TO PART THREE

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