WATERS OF MY BIRTH

Directly continued from THE MEDEA STEAMPUNK'D

By Atonia Walpole

(Picture creations also by Atonia)

Part 1

Margret Langston leaned slightly over the railing to see the gray-green water below. One of the crew members had told her the fog would lift by mid morning. She wrapped the tartan shawl around her shoulders, feeling the damp. The Medea was leaving the little bay and heading out to sea.

“Margret, there’s tea!” Mandi called from the lounge.

“Thank you, dear.” She tucked a stray lock of hair behind her ear and came in out of the damp. “I cannot believe you have lived on this yacht for two months.”

“We’ve had some breaks.” Mandi poured a mug of tea for Margret and handed it to her. “You will get a break now from Lyssa.”

“Ah, she’s been no problem. She just fits right into whatever’s on for the day. Some days she’s been to work and some days she larks about with my sister, Inez. They say this ship has come home, that it was built here.”

“It is a Scottish yacht. It was built for William Macalister Hall of Torrisdale Castle, Scotland. He used it for hunting and fishing trips around the waterways of western Scotland."

“Well then, it should see us home safely.”

“There hasn’t been a problem at all and we’ve been through some rough seas.”

“I’ll bet you have. How is he?” Margret took a sip of her tea.

“He’s well. He feels very well. He only has massages now and an occasional painkiller. You saw how he walks with the canes. You know we all made fun of the little Chinaman who went out with us to Sicily, but he knew his stuff. David’s been through all kinds of treatments and therapy but the acupuncture worked for him.”

“A lot of mumbo-jumbo but then my great aunt was a healer. She used natural herbs and barks and kept to the old ways. I say whatever works. So, Mandi, how is he otherwise?”

“You know why we went to Sicily. I think he is finally through with his Chinese family. They ask too much of him and give him nothing in return.”

“Don’t speak too hastily there. He will never be through with his mother,” she sighed. “I barely got to speak with him when you arrived. Lyssa has captured him completely. Poor little tyke.”

“Why do you say she’s a poor little tyke?”

“She lost her mother and very nearly lost her father. She sees very little of him of late. My own opinion, which is worth nothing, is that he needs to settle for awhile. Lyssa will start school next session and he’s got to make plans for that and be there for her. I don’t mind taking care of her at all, I hope you know that, but she’s not mine.”

“She’s not mine, either, but I love her.”

“Because you love him.”

“That, too,” Mandi smiled, “but I do love his daughter.”

“He needs you to balance him otherwise he will pull away from women. You know what I mean.”

“Yes.” Mandi looked into her teacup. She knew very well. He never so much as looked at another woman with thoughts other than whatever was at hand. If he ever stepped out it was with a male, like the young man in Nantes.

Lyssa was in the middle of Blaine’s bed with the monocle, looking through the glass at her Daddy and Billy. They were seated in chairs by the bed.

Billy folded the paper and put it aside on the table. “What do you reckon?” he asked Blaine.

Blaine smiled at his daughter. “I’d like to think they found that crack in the world. I never told you I had a dream about Gustav. It must have been about the time the airship disappeared. I felt he was trying to reach me. It disturbed me for some time.”

“Hard to believe 300 of them bought into that. The young can be so gullible sometimes,” Billy said.

“We never talked about Gustav,” Blaine said softly. “I want to talk about him.”

“With her here?” Billy nodded in Lyssa’s direction.

“I’m not going to be graphic. He was obviously a beautiful young man. He was very loving and sweet but he reminded me of me. He’s cut all ties with everything and everyone and came alone to Nantes. There were some others there from the University that knew of him. He’d withdrawn into his own world as I had before I left Hong Kong. I, too, cut all ties because I had expected to die. Whether Gustav thought that was a possibility I do not know. He spoke of adventure.”

“I believe you cared for him.”

“I did, yes. But only for a night, Billy, and never to see him again.”

“I see you,” Lyssa said

“I see you, too, my baby.”

“Once we get home I intend to make appointments for all three of us with the clinic. I want us tested for every known little cell that might cause us problems. Mandi and I had an experience in Sicily and we’ve since been with you and then you pick up this boy and we’ve been with you since then…better to be safe than the alternative.”

Blaine looked at him a moment. “He was clean.”

“So he said to you…he was leaving this earth behind. It didn’t matter what he told anyone. You are way too trusting, Blaine, and may I say…gullible.” Billy got up from his chair and left Blaine’s cabin.

Blaine’s eyes flashed for a second or two until Lyssa claimed his attention.

Later Billy had the opportunity to tell Mandi what he’d said to Blaine. “He’s probably going to be angry with me for awhile over that but it had to be said.”

“You don’t think we might be infected with something, do you?”

“No, love, I don’t but I want us to be checked out. He can’t go about picking up strangers. If that’s the kind of thing he wants, then fine. Things will change between us because I won’t be a party to it.”

“I don’t think that’s what he wants, Billy.”

“I really don’t think he knows what he wants. He’s like that, Mandi.”

“He wants everything. He wants it all.”

Margret stood on the deck and watched Blaine’s chair rise with Lyssa on his lap.

“What a contraption that is but it works for you. Come here, girl.” She took Lyssa off his lap so he could get out of the chair. “You are getting around pretty well, I see.”

“Yes, there are still obstacles but I do very well.”

“I wonder you can walk at all with the roll of this boat under you.”

“I’ve had plenty of practice. Margret, there is a life jacket in the lounge under a locker. Please put it on Lyssa. I know she will stay with you but still I will feel better.”

Lyssa did not like the confining life jacket at all and complained about it. Blaine told her she would have to stay below if she didn’t wear it.

They went into dinner in the dining room. It was Mandi who took Lyssa below to get her ready for bed. Billy soon followed and left Margret and Blaine in the lounge with coffee.

“She wants to sleep with me and I said she could.”

“Might be all right on the boat but when she gets home put her back in her room.”

“Mandi sees to that.”

“Hm. Your back is holding out for you?”

“Yes, although I am looking forward to swimming again. I’ve not done anything for the last two months.” David reached for a slim cigar.

“I heard the acupuncture helped you.”

“It did and I may find someone to treat me again.”

“When will you be ready to go to work again?”

“Soon. Let me get home. How did the job in Carlisle go?”

“It’s finished. Only need to wait until spring to see the results.”

“I want to work…I need it.”

“Of course you do. A man needs something to do otherwise he gets sidetracked and goes off on strange missions to Sicily.”

Blaine smiled, “You are so right. But this mission did open my eyes. I risked people I love and myself. It could have been worse for us. It was bad enough for Mandi and Billy. I have let my cousin know that I am not available. I am not physically or mentally available.”

“But if your mother requests you?”

“It will depend on what the request is. She birthed me and for awhile cared for me. I have not been her son for a very long time. You are more my mother than she.”

“I’m not old enough to be your mother but I thank you for the thought.”

Blaine looked at her with narrowed eyes and drew on his cigar. “Sometimes I need a strong shoulder.”

“I expect you have Billy with a strong shoulder.”

“I did not put that very well. If I were a small boy I would like to climb in my mother’s lap and be comforted. I have no mother and I am not a small boy.  Still that desire is there.”

Margret smiled a little. “You want to sit in my lap, Blaine?”

He smiled back. “I think of it sometimes. Your arms are strong.”

“Anytime you need strong arms, come and see me.”

“Thank you.”

“I think I’m going to bed.” She stood and picked up her tartan. “Have a good night with Lyssa.”

“Good night, Margret.”

He finished his cigar and walked out on the deck looking up at the stars. He thought again of Gustav and wished he hadn’t gone with the others on the airship.

“Are you ready to go down?” It was Billy, coming out of the lounge. He’d come up the stairs.

“Not quite. It’s a lovely evening.”

“Indeed it is. Clear skies and bright moon. Are you warm enough?”

“Yes, Billy, I am warm.” Blaine turned and smiled at him.

Billy felt better. At least he wasn’t still angry. “You know, I was thinking it might be a good idea sometime when we want to take Medea out again to follow the waterways she knew as a young woman.”

Blaine looked at him for a while. “That sounds like something I would have thought of if I were thinking.”

“Well, I’ve been looking at maps of Scotland.”

“We haven’t even got home yet and you’re planning another getaway.”

“Not planning, it was just a thought. No, I’m ready to get home for awhile. I’m beginning to walk like a sailor…odd gait, you know.”

Blaine laughed, “I think I’m ready now to go below.”

“Right.” Billy met his eyes for a moment and leaned in and kissed him.

His surprise was mirrored in his eyes. In was not an unwelcomed kiss from Billy but it was unexpected.  Billy never instigated anything between them.

Part 2

For something to do Blaine had his sketch pad out sitting on the deck. Lyssa was with him in her life jacket and wearing the monocle. Margret was in the lounge with a book and Billy on the deck, keeping an eye on Lyssa. Mandi was laid low with menstrual cramps in her cabin.

Mandi lay on her bed. The sounds of the engine chugging along, Lyssa’s running feet now and again above her. Familiar sounds and smells but it wasn’t. She felt like she was in a foreign country and didn’t know the language. Blaine knew she wasn’t feeling well but he hadn’t been in to see her. She hadn’t seen him since he came into his cabin the night before when she’d gotten Lyssa ready for bed. He gave her a brief kiss in passing.

She curled up under a blanket. There was something going on and she didn’t quite know what it was. For herself she thought she had begun to care too much and maybe that was Billy’s problem, too. The three of them in a relationship not unlike a marriage with Blaine the center of it all. Blaine as much as she loved him, and she did, there were times she wanted to walk away from him. Perhaps it had been the boy in Nantes that brought it all to a head. He’d walked away from them without a thought for a casual encounter.

Margret had been stressing to her how important she was to Blaine for balance. He’d told her himself he would never love another woman after her. But it was hard…it was hard sometimes. She thought of him when she first met him in the hospital He’d been so helpless then, so beautiful, so…but Ali had been there, Ali, who knew David better than anyone. He’d been the strong one and he’d led her along, too, teaching her how to love him.

David was stronger now and able to get about on his own without her or Billy. He was carrying them instead of the other way around. When had she become so weak that she needed carrying? She dozed for a while and then became aware she was not alone in her cabin. She woke to find Billy sitting on the foot of her bed with his head leaning on the wall.

“Billy?” She rubbed her eyes.

“Hello, love. Have a good nap?”

“Yes.”

“Did the pills do the trick?”

“It’s eased. What are you doing here?”

He was quiet for a moment. “Have you ever felt the need for a place to go…a bolt hole, as it were, where you could go and get out of it for awhile?”

“Away…?”

“Yes. You and I, we both gave up what we had when we came to Blaine. We are totally dependent on him.”

“I know. What do you want to do about it?”

“Find a little flat somewhere, something that’s ours. We’d both have a key and when we felt the need to get out to ourselves and recharge our batteries we could go there for a few days.”

“It was the boy in Nantes, wasn’t it?” she said, pulling her blanket up as she sat against the headboard.

“Yes, I believe it was. I haven’t forgiven him for that. It bothered you, too, didn’t it?”

“I’m not sure what to think about it. I feel like we were taken for granted, that we’d still be there waiting as we were if he’d been a week up there in that room with Gustav. Don’t get me wrong, I love him and I took him back in my bed immediately, but he never gave us a thought.”

“What do you think about a flat?”

“I can go in half on it. I’ve still got the money from the sale of my old flat.”

“I’ll have a look when we get home. We’ll look after each other, Mandi.”

She smiled and reached for his hand. Billy pulled her down beside him. “Not a word.”

“Oh, no. He knows too much about us as it is. He plays with us, Billy, as if we were his toys.”

“Only because we let him. Because we love him we let him have his way. We shouldn’t do that, you know.”

Blaine found himself sketching from memory, the passing scenery forgotten at the bottom of the page. He sketched half of Gustav’s face, the hand piece he’d worn that so fascinated him. He closed the book and moved it on his lap, a half torn page, and he opened it again. It was an old sketch of Ali and he smiled to think Ali might be trying to tell him something. Ali…

There was restlessness inside of Blaine. He couldn’t seem to concentrate on anything for any length of time. His routines were banished for the last two months. The things that quieted his spirit, his soul and his body were missing. It would be good to get home again. He closed his eyes and thought about his rose garden still putting out its roots. He hoped it had all been taken care of in his absence. The pool, heated water to support him. Ah, yes, he missed that. The quiet house…

“Daddy, look!” Lyssa was pulling at his arm.

The quiet house had been in Hong Kong. “Yes, my darling. It’s a fish of some kind…oh no, a porpoise. Yes,” he smiled and hugged his daughter.

“I’m looking at the coast of Wales. We’re just passing Cardigan Bay,” Blaine said into his phone

“I am looking at Cardigan Mews. I’m in London.”

Blaine felt the excitement in his chest. “How long?”

“Long enough. I will be here for two weeks but, alas, I am booked.”

“You cannot find an hour for an old friend?”

“For you, I reserve my nights. So you are coming home, my darling?”

“Yes. It’s been quite a voyage.”

“I look forward to seeing you. How is the family…Mandi?”

“They are well. I have Margret Langston and Lyssa on the Medea with me.”

“I want to see them all; somehow I will steal a day and come down.”

“It is good to hear your voice.”

“It is good to hear yours, too, and even better when I can taste its source.”

The lethargy that had set in for the last few days left him immediately. Blaine could hardly wait to get home. Ali was in London.

He walked into the lounge where Margret was sitting out of the sun.

“You’re getting too much sun, Blaine.”

“I forgot about sunscreen. Ali is in London.”

She looked up at him. “How wonderful for you.”

“It has been a long time.” He bit his lip.

“What about Billy and Mandi?”

He looked at her strangely. “What about them?”

She shrugged.

“Mandi will happy to see him.”

“I am sure she will be.” Margret remembered the night at her house. “Billy, does he know Ali?”

“No, they have never met but he knows of him.”

“He knows that you will be with Ali, then?”

“Of course I will be with Ali…Billy will not mind it.”

“Billy is in your employ, you pay him…do you pay him for sex or is that just part of the contract.”

Blaine was amazed. He sat down. “I pay him well; I depend on him daily for my needs.”

“Your needs include sex or is that given freely?”

“Margret, I do not understand this.”

“Billy loves you, Blaine. Have a thought for him. You didn’t answer me.”

“He gives freely of himself because he loves me. I do not pay for sex.”

“I’ve made you angry. Well, it’s of no consequence to me. I say what I please because I am not in your employ. I am only an observer. I am also not that familiar with your sex life nor do I want to be. I see a man devoted to you in every way and sometimes I think you see through him and do not see him at all.”

Blaine sat back sulkily in his chair. He didn’t like being talked to this way. “Billy belongs to me, he is mine and I do care for him. I do love him, Margret.”

“I’m glad to hear that you do. However, he is not ‘yours’; he is a free man. I’m only saying to take care of his feelings.” She looked at him a moment. “You wanted a mother.”

He glanced away for a moment and back at her. “This is what a mother does, chastises her son?”

“If he needs it.”

“When does she love him?”

“All of the time.”

“Do you?”

“Yes, Blaine, I do.”

“That is a burden you may soon regret.” He stood up, gained his balance and canes and walked out.

Margret frowned and looked after him. Loving him was a burden? She didn’t think so. She’d loved him for some time and not always with a motherly eye.

Blaine went down in his chair. Billy came out of the library where he and Mandi were entertaining Lyssa.

“Billy, come.” Blaine passed by him.

Billy frowned and followed him into his own cabin. “What is it, Blaine?”

“I’ve had a call from Ali. He’s in London and I mean to spend some time with him, as much as possible.”

“Mandi has told me about Ali.”

“Margret Langston thinks you might be offended or upset in some way by this.”

“She’s an old woman who should mind her business. I would like, if the opportunity arises, to meet this Prince who captured you at an early age.”

Blaine smiled slightly. “You shall meet him. I didn’t think you’d be upset. After all, you do understand these things.”

“I understand Ali.” Billy raised a brow. He touched Blaine’s face. “You’ve got a touch of sun. It looks good on you.”

Blaine reached up and ran a hand through his hair, his eyes never leaving Billy’s.

“Don’t flirt with me.”

Blaine smiled lazily. “Why?”

Billy reached behind him and locked his door. Blaine had been teasing him for days. It was time he paid up.

“Hello, Mandi.” Margret stopped by the library. “Have you seen Blaine?”

Mandi looked at her innocently enough. “He’s with Billy.”

“Ah,” she smiled quickly.

Part 3

The Medea berthed in Portsmouth and Billy went to reclaim their car while they did some last minute packing. Blaine had Lyssa on deck. Margret and Mandi still were down in their cabins.

Mandi had it all packed and picked up Lyssa’s pajama bottoms and took them into Margret’s cabin. She had Lyssa’s case. “I’m all through,” she said.

“Yes…oh, her jammies,” she smiled. “I’m ready. Mandi, you do know he’s off as soon as he’s home?”

“I know, Margret, but only for a little while and then he’s ours again.”

“He needs to settle for awhile.”

“I know and he knows it, too, but this is Ali and he doesn’t get to see him very often. It will be all right.” Mandi smiled and gave Margret a hug.

Margret insisted she be taken to a train station and would not hear anything about riding with them to her house.

David got out of the car and walked her into the station. “You are the most stubborn woman I have ever known. But I love you and I love you for taking care of Lyssa for me. Give me two weeks and put me to work.”

She looked into his eyes. “Two weeks. Take care, Blaine.” She kissed his cheek and he grabbed her to him for a moment.

“You take care, too.” He watched her walk away, carrying her old fashioned bag. He harbored conflicted feelings for Margret Langston. She’d saved him on more than one occasion but it bothered him in a way that was hard to define. He was grateful to her, liked being around her, he felt…safe with her and then the other side of that was that she loved him. He wished she didn’t. He wished he didn’t know.

Billy carried a sleeping Lyssa up to her room as Mandi followed with Lyssa’s bag.

Blaine walked through the house, turning on lights. It smelled clean, smelled of wax and polish, but it needed airing out.

“I’m going to make a run down to the market to pick up a few things to get us through the night and morning. Is there anything you want, Blaine?” Billy asked.

“No…no, don’t bother about me. I’ll be going tomorrow.”

“Right.” Billy left.

Mandi came and found him in the front sitting room. “It’s good to be back.” She came to him and slipped an arm around his waist. “Good to be on solid ground.”

“Yes, it is, Mandi.” He kissed the top of her head. “Thanks for putting up with me. I know it was a long and sometimes unpleasant journey.”

“Yes to all of that. I’m glad I went with you.”

“I may go to some strange places sometimes but knowing you are there brings me back. I do love you, Mandi.” He kissed her slowly and thoroughly.

Her arms went around him, holding tightly. She heard his words but she also wondered if Gustav hadn’t got on that airship what might have happened there. A little bit of trust was gone from her but none of the love she felt for him.

“You’ll be home tonight? Good…you are mine tonight." She kissed him. “Ali can have leftovers and you can tell him I said that.”

Blaine laughed, “I will…I will tell him.”

A car came for him the next morning at 9:00. Mandi and Billy and Lyssa waved from the front steps. Mandi had to quiet some tears with Lyssa. She finally got her interested in a video. She found Billy still at the breakfast table with a newspaper.

“While he’s gone, if it’s all right with you, I’m going to check out some real estate.”

“Yes, of course. I’d trust you to find us something.”

“I’ll have you to come and have a look before we sign anything.”

“Are we being disloyal?” Mandi asked, picking up a piece of cold toast.

“How long did we wait in the lobby for him in Nantes?”

“Eight hours.”

“He was never sorry. No, we are not being disloyal. You don’t have to do this, Mandi. I can do it alone. I need it worse than you do.”

“I’m with you. I have other fears and I need a place to go and feed on them sometimes. I'm under a lot of pressure…I mean it’s not bad pressure but...he said I’m the only woman he will ever love. If something happens between us then no more. They’ve all left him in one fashion or another. He told me this in Spain when I was about to go. He is very passionate.”

“He can be. I remember how he was with Charlie. You wouldn’t know he ever looked at a man. She tried but couldn’t accept what he was. He gave me the sack over her. She walked in on something she wasn’t to see.”

“He lived straight then?”

“For all to see he did. She knew about Ali but for her it all represented a threat, diminished her or something. The die was cast for Blaine a long time ago, maybe even before he was born.  He grew up without any guidance in that direction. He had a schoolboy’s crush on his martial arts instructor and from what I can piece together it was his cousin that told on him and he wasn’t allowed to go any more to martial arts school.”

“This same cousin that came here and sent him to Sicily?”

“Yes. It was after that he was sent away to England. His cousin said while he was here that Blaine was like his father and at the time I thought in looks, which he is, but now I’m thinking there might have been something else, too. Perhaps his father went both ways.”

“You’ve never been jealous of me, have you?”

“No, Mandi. You and I share him. He needs us both.”

“Ayy, I’m not so sure he couldn’t live without me. As long as he had you. The thing is I’m not sure I could live without him. I tried for awhile and came back to him.”

“Same as me. Well, let’s get this kitchen cleaned up. I’ll do a soup for lunch and then take a ride up London and see what’s what.”

Mandi loved Billy. They were best friends and only occasional lovers, though she appreciated he was a handsome man with a good body. They’d formed a bond between them over Blaine. They needed each other for support.  “I think I’ll do two month's worth of laundry!” she laughed.  It had been two months since she’d done any laundry. The yacht’s crew had taken care of their clothes.

They spent the rest of the morning in domestic chores.

Blaine had been driven to London and an aide took him shopping for two hours until Ali was free. Ali had a penthouse apartment lent to him by a friend. This is where Blaine was taken and shown to his room. He bathed and dressed in the new clothes. His scent was found in his bathroom. Ali forgot nothing. He wandered out of his rooms and down the hallway into a large seating area. He heard Ali’s voice talking to someone and a thrill went from top to bottom. He moved around looking at paintings with his hands on the silver handles of his canes and a slight smile on his lips. He finally moved within Ali’s vision. A smile curved his lips, too, and he was trying to end the conversation with his visitor but his eyes kept flicking over Blaine.  Finally he stood, indicating he was through and the man should leave. It took a little while and Ali walked him to the door and closed it behind him with a thud.

“I thought he would never leave.” He advanced on Blaine. “My God, you look beautiful! You’ve a tan.”

“Two months at sea. Ali.” He went readily into Ali’s arms and his canes hit the floor.

They touched and kissed and finally pulled apart. “You don’t know how good it is to see you standing again. This is much better than the clinic.”

“I’ve had many treatments since then and acupuncture works the best for me. I can take a step or two. Maybe someday…more.”

“God willing. I’m free until 4:00. I thought we might have lunch and then… well.” He let it trail off. Ali touched his face in a caress and then picked up his canes for him.

“It is so good to see you.” He walked beside Ali, who was watching how he walked with his canes.

“You, too, my darling. I’ve much to tell you and I want to hear of your journey. You are impressed with the Medea?”

“Oh yes, she is a beautiful thing. Beautiful thing, she took us to the Med and back to Scotland and then to Portsmouth. I think I am going to move her, though, as soon as I can locate a berth in Southampton. Portsmouth is too big.”

“The crew was...?”

“Excellent. Thank you.” He stopped and kissed Ali quickly. They were at the door to the dining room.

During lunch Blaine told him about Sicily.

Ali’s face showed concern and he shook his head a little. “Don’t do this again, Blaine.”

“I am not going to. I have sent word to my cousin.”

“Good. This little man who presumably killed the couple…you never knew who sent him?”

“He was a spy for whom I do not know, perhaps the chairman’s offices. It does not matter.”

“And he was the one who cured your horrific pain…amazing.”

“The same, a very strange person. He had been working for a someone here in London, a Chinese physician and acupuncturist. I may look him up before I go home.”

“Let me have him checked out first. We do not want another strange individual sticking needles into you.”

“How are things for you?” Blaine asked.

Ali spent most of the time telling him how things were. A period of semi peace and lessening of intrigue in the palace. “I also have another child on the way,” he shrugged.

“How many does this make?” Blaine grinned.

“I think I lose count,” Ali chuckled. “It is good for me to have children...many children. It takes away rumor and innuendo.”

Their eyes met and they smiled. Lunch was over.

They were in Ali’s bedroom and the first bloom of passion was over.

“Your skin is so soft and smooth.” Ali ran his hand over Blaine’s back.

“That’s Billy’s doing. He gives me massages, frequently.”

“Hmm, I shall have to meet this Billy. He takes good care of you.”

“Yes, he does very good care. I’d like for you to meet him.”

“I shall come down to the country before I go. I must see Mandi.”

“Oh, she said to tell you that you have leftovers today. She had me last night.”

“I’ll take leftovers; they are damn good.”

“I have something else to tell you. We stopped in Nantes, the Isle of Nantes.”

“Oh, were you there when the airship arrived?”

“Yes.”

“An amazing thing that was. We tracked it, of course, because no one knew exactly what it was up to.”

“They were looking for Utopia, for that crack in the world that Jules Verne found.”

“Ah, yes, I remember. It has been a long time since I read any Verne.”

“I think the people who bought into it were avid students of Verne. Steampunk, have you heard the term?”

“Yes, I have. I am not so isolated.” Ali placed a hand flat on Blaine’s stomach.

“I met someone while we were there, a young man. He was beautiful, Ali, and I connected with him immediately. His name was Gustav. I spent the night with him and then he got on the airship and was gone.”

“You?” Ali looked incredulous. “You took a one night stand?”

“I didn’t mean to. I was waiting on Mandi and Billy to come off a ride and he approached me. I’d seen him reading from Verne’s work earlier in a tavern. He kissed me. He fascinated me. I went to his room with him.”

“I don’t have to tell you how dangerous this is for you and for all of us.”

“It was all right. He was clean…very particular.”

“It’s not just diseases, my darling. People do strange things to others in the name of pleasure. You could have been hurt.  Promise me you will not do this again.  Where were Mandi and Billy?”

“They were on the ride and then, oh, Ali, I know I did not think about them. They found me and waited all night downstairs in the lobby. Sometimes I treat them very badly. I’m not proud of that and still I am not sorry about Gustav. It was a beautiful experience with him.”

“Just as well he went on the airship. You might have lost everything. Blaine…you are very vulnerable.”

“Billy said gullible.”

“That, too. I am liking this Billy more and more.  What I wanted to say is that you are in a way very delicate. You want someone to take you, to make love to you, you are submissive. That works for us. I love you that way.” Ali kissed his beast bone. “But you leave yourself open to injury.”

“I am not always submissive.”

Ali began a grin. “You have been with me.”

“I want to be with you. It’s not always that way with Billy. It works both ways with Mandi.” He smiled a little.

“Ah, yes, Mandi. Tell her I have eaten up her leftovers.”

“Have you…have you found someone?” Blaine’s wife, Charlie, had killed Ali’s lover after he’d tried to kill her.

“There is always someone. Ah, Blaine, in another life you and I.”

“Yes, Ali, it would be you and I.”

“We would not need someone else to give our love to. I do miss you. There has never been anyone like you. He laced fingers with Blaine, pushed his arm above his head and kissed him.

Part 4

Blaine had been gone for two days. Billy had made two days of looking for a flat.

“I think I’ve found it,” he said to Mandi out in the back garden. “It’s on the Thames, quite oddly enough. Nice building, safe area. It’s furnished. Has one large bedroom and a small one with a desk and a daybed. Not that we’d need that unless we run away together,” he grinned.

“Not too expensive?”

“Yes, it’s expensive. It will take all you’ve got and all I’ve got to get it. But with the market like it is now if we should ever sell we’ll make that and more.”

“Are you sure? I mean I’m in no hurry or anything.”

“As far as the flat goes I’m sure. I could go on looking at real estate for the next six months. We’ve got a good price because the flat has not been updated. It’s livable and personally I find it comfortable.”

“I was thinking today after you left. We essentially work for David. He pays us. All this extra love and relationships that have formed are extra. We have never taken a vacation or a day off like the cook did.”

“We’re more family than employees but you are right, we’re paid. I wonder if he thinks we won’t be here for him if he doesn’t pay us. As if I’d leave him.”

“I almost did.”

“I’m glad you didn’t.” Billy caught her hand and kissed the back of it. “Now, of course, if he didn’t pay us we couldn’t afford the flat. We’d be flat broke.”

“We are FLAT broke!” she laughed and he joined in.

On the fourth day they took Lyssa to London with them to the estate agent’s office.  One by one they went inside and signed the papers while the other looked after Lyssa in the car park. Billy came out with the keys and they had to go have a look.

“Who lives here?” Lyssa asked.

“Friends,” Billy said and looked at Mandi.

“That’s right…friends,” she smiled.

They didn’t spend much time there. Out in the neighborhood to get a feel for it, they walked a few blocks, found the grocery and the bottle shop, pubs and restaurants that looked promising. They also found a park and let Lyssa run and play with some children for awhile. They were as excited about the flat as if they’d bought their first house together.

Mandi reminded him they’d better be careful around Lyssa because she’d tell her Daddy.

“A chance we’ll have to take. Say we went to visit someone and they weren’t home or whatever falls out of our lying mouths.” He started the car and pulled out into traffic.

“He’s been gone now for four days and not once has he called home,” Mandi whispered.

Billy turned up the radio. “I have noticed that. You would think with the kid that he’d be a little more concerned about home and hearth.”

“I’m sure he’s on a whirlwind with Ali. He’s pretty heady stuff. He gets in your veins like warm wine. You think you can’t get enough. He’ll pet and pamper him, buy him pretty things. But honestly, Billy, he loves him to death and David loves him, too. It’s kind of sad when you think about it.”

“Sad they can’t be together?”

“Yeah,” Mandi sighed. “We had a thing going for awhile when Blaine was still in hospital. The three of us. Ali is…well, he kind of blew me away. But I knew, you see, that it was David he loved and David he wanted to be with. When he took him to Switzerland I pulled out. I was trying to save myself from a lot of pain. In the end…I came back for it. It took nearly a year for me to realize I must love pain.”

Billy looked over at her. She’d begun to cry. He glanced in the back seat. Lyssa had gone to sleep in her car seat. Good thing, he thought.

“He loves me because I’m crazy, because I’m a little kinky. I’ll do anything. I like to have fun. All that’s true about me,” she sniffed and took the handkerchief from Billy. “But I’m also pretty sensitive. My antenna are right up there sensing the way the wind blows. I had to go and fall in love with him. It was more fun when it was fun.” She cried into the cloth.

Billy blinked and turned off the exit that would take them home. “Mandi…it’s going to be all right. We’ll make it all right, okay. What do you say about fish and chips? Nobody wants to cook tonight.”

She smiled and wiped her eyes. “I’d say yes.” She looked in the back seat at Lyssa. “Get some chicken fingers for her.”

After she’d bathed and read to Lyssa until she went to sleep for the night, Mandi came down and found Billy outside on the patio with a bottle of wine and two glasses, but he was well into it.

“Did you get her down?”

“Yeah, she’s so sweet and says goodnight to her daddy every night. Damn him.”

“Tomorrow is five days. That’s long enough without contact. I’ll call him and see what’s on.” He poured her a glass of wine. “Might as well get sloshed.”

“I agree.” She turned her glass up. “I miss him.”

“So do I. He’s the hub and when he’s not here we go through the motions and I forget just why.” Billy took another drink.

Mandi looked at him. It was all right for her to have a meltdown like she’d done on the way home from London, but Billy was pretty close himself. She reached out to him.

“I’m all right, Mandi.”

“It’s all right if you’re not.”

“Tomorrow…we’ll get it sorted.” He took another drink.

“Let’s make him come home.”

“Oh, now…no need for that. We’ll ask him, though.” He looked across the little table at her. “You’re too far away. Come over here, bring your chair over here. Let’s count the stars.”

She did as he asked and he put his arm around her chair and they looked up at the stars and began to count and call out formations they recognized. His voice broke and she quickly looked at him and saw the tears from the corner of his eyes. “Let me love you,” she said.

He shook his head slightly and then pulled her to him. She slept in his bed that night.

“Blaine, how are you?”

“I’m well, Billy. Is everything all right there?”

“Ah, well, I reckon it is. Lyssa is fine. We were just wondering when you might be coming home.”

“I’m not sure…”

“Not sure…?” Billy wiped his face.

Mandi took the phone from him. “You’d better come home while you’ve got somebody to come home to. Unless you’ve done with us.”

“Mandi…Oh, Mandi.”

“That’s all…come home.” She hung up the phone.

“Well, that’s done it. He’ll probably sack us both.”

“That’s okay. I can get my old job back. We’ve got a place to go.”

 

He arrived at 2:00 that afternoon in Ali’s chauffer-driven limo. The driver took two bags to the door for him, his new wardrobe and trinkets bought by Ali. He’d been pampered with manicures and pedicures and massages and body scrubs and a haircut. He looked and smelled like a million dollars.

He opened the door, pulling the bags inside. There was no one to greet him at the door. He walked through the house and found them in the back garden.

“He’s here.” Billy saw him come out the door and down the little short ramp.

Mandi pushed her hair back, narrowing her eyes. He looked good enough to eat but she was angry with him and put her appetite on the back burner.

“Billy?"  Blaine got to him first. “What’s…?" Lyssa saw him and came running, cutting off any conversation they might have had.

Billy went past him and into the house, found his bags and took them upstairs and unpacked for him. He went to the window and glanced down into the garden. Mandi hadn’t moved from her chair and Blaine had Lyssa on his lap over on the other side of the patio in the wooden chairs.

At least he had come home. Mandi’s plea had worked. Perhaps he did care after all. Billy sighed. Time would tell. Lyssa would have to be dealt with first. Poor tyke.

“And we went to London,” Lyssa said, catching Blaine up on everything.

“When did you go to London?” he asked, interested.

“Um, some days,” she answered.

“What did you do in London?” he asked.

Played in a park and went for a walk cause the friends weren’t home.”

“What friends?”

“I don’t know.”

He looked across at Mandi, who was ignoring him. “Is that about it, Lyssa?”

“No.” She put her arms around his neck. “You stay home now.”

“Okay,” he smiled and kissed her. She was ready to get down and play now. He let her down and watched her run about the garden.

“Mandi?”

“David.”

“I want to know what is going on here.”

“You didn’t want to know before 10:00 this morning. You didn’t want to know yesterday or the day before. I have to wonder just how long it would be before you wanted to know what is going on here in your home with your daughter and the people who love you. It should be obvious to us by now that out of sight and out of mind is how your mind works. But this time Lyssa was here too.”

“Mandi, I…”

“Nothing and I mean nothing is going to answer for that!” She rose from her chair. “I feel sorry for her. I feel sorry for you. Now that you’re home, you can take charge of her for awhile. Your nanny is going AWOL. Be sure and deduct it from my pay.” She left the garden and went up to her room and slammed the door. Then she went back and locked it.

Billy heard what she said. He’d come down to the back door and stopped while she was speaking. Brave little Mandi. She went past him in a blaze. He wasn’t so brave. He looked out at Blaine, who appeared stunned by her speech. And well he should be. He looked around and thought…put the kettle on.

 

His eyes smarted and he blinked it away. He felt like he’d been smacked severely in the face. He had no comeback for what she’d said. She was right. He’d been indulging himself, caught up in Ali and letting Ali lead and direct. He knew better but how easy it was to drift…drift in Ali’s arms. It was what he’d searched for his whole life, someone to hold him and take care of everything. He could fall into Ali and know he would never touch the ground.

Billy quietly brought out a tray with tea, some biscuits and butter.

“Billy."

“Have a cuppa, love.”

“I’ve lost Mandi.”

“I don’t think you could lose her on market day in Calcutta.” Billy made his tea and handed it to him.

“I’m selfish and self centered.”

“Yes.”

“I don’t deserve any of you.”

“That’s probably true but, alas, you’re stuck with us.”

“I can’t even apologize.”

“Not accepted anyway. Your tender is no good here. The only thing we accept here is honesty.”

“You don’t want to know the truth.”

Billy looked at him. “Drink your tea. It will go cold.”

“I would have come home tomorrow. Ali is coming tomorrow.”

“Well, it will be good to meet him.”

“He wants to meet you. I told him about you.”

“Did you? That must have taken all of three seconds.”

“No, much longer,” he half smiled at Billy.

“Why did you come home today?”

“I felt I’d better.”

“Something here you care about?”

“Yes, Billy, something here I care about.”

Mandi packed a bag with things she could leave in London. No need to be worrying about a bag every time she went there. In her mind she saw it happening often. She unlocked her door and went to the hall landing and looked out. Blaine was still out there with Billy. Good, she thought, and ran down the stairs. It was tricky getting to her car in the garage but she soon made it undetected Quietly she eased it out, let it drift down away from the house and then started the motor. She was on her way to the flat in London.

“She’s upset, Blaine. Give her some time to sort it out. I know she loves you.”

Blaine looked over at Billy. “It’s not good. It’s not good, Billy.”

“Only you can make it right. Don’t rush it and say things that you can’t back up. You have to be honest with her if you want to keep her. Otherwise…let her go.”

“No…no, I can’t let her go. I did once…never again.”

Part 5

The limo pulled up at 9:30. Early for Ali but he was worried about Blaine. He’d left so abruptly the day before. His driver knocked on the door and it was Blaine who answered. Ali jumped out of the limo and walked quickly to the door. He dismissed the driver until 4:00.

He and Blaine embraced and closed the door.

“What is it?” He looked Blaine in the eyes.

“I’ve been away too long.”

“Ah.”

“Mandi is gone.”

Ali didn’t say anything. His attention was drawn to the stairs where Billy was coming down in somewhat of a rush.

“I heard the door but…oh.”

Blaine took his arm. “Billy, this is Ali.”

Ali’s eyes bored into him as was his way when meeting a stranger. Billy didn’t flinch. There was nothing inside that wasn’t visible outside.

“It’s good to meet at last,” Billy smiled. “Not quite sure how to address you.”

“Ali is always good. It is good to meet you, too. You take very good care of my darling, Blaine.”

“I try. I do as he’ll allow.”

Ali smiled a little. “Yes, he’s like that. You say Mandi is gone?”

Blaine bit his lip.

“Oh, she’ll be back,” Billy said.

“You are sure of this?” Ali asked him.

“Pretty sure.”

“You know where she is?”

Billy didn’t answer. “She just needs a little time.”

Ali smiled a little again. So Billy knew.

“Lyssa is in the garden,” Blaine said, "I need to keep an eye.”

“Well, go and keep an eye. I will talk with Billy for awhile. We can get acquainted.”

Blaine made his way out of the house and Billy led Ali into the front sitting room. “Tea or coffee?” he asked.

“Not just yet. Tell me.”

“Tell you what?”

“Everything.”

Billy sighed, “Not sure where to begin. We love him, Mandi and I.  He did something in Nantes that we never thought he’d do. He went with a stranger, without a word, without anything. We spent hours searching for him and finally found him in a room above a tavern with this boy. We waited over eight hours for him. Waited because we didn’t know what…well, it turned out he was okay but you never know and this was a strange dude. He never said he was sorry. Sorry for our worry, but that was it. It hurt, Ali. It hurt us both. Mandi says she doesn’t trust him anymore. This week he goes off for five days without a word. He doesn’t call to check on his daughter or to say when he’s coming back. It’s not like him to be this way. We’re worried about him.”

“You have been very open with me. Blaine is so easy to love, harder to live with. I only lived with him for a few years while we were in school. We were not so…intimate then, but close enough to know what he was capable of. I love him with my whole being. It is my life that prevents us from being together. I was taken from him by my father, sent home to my country and married. He was left alone. He went home to this house for a while but he could not belong here so he went back to Hong Kong and made a life for himself. He has a fatalistic streak in him that I have had to prevent from time to time. A sacrificial lamb. I honestly think there are times he wanted to die. I cannot let that happen. I cannot imagine a world without him in it.”

“He’s said you are the love of his life.”

“And he is mine.  You know about this mother?  Yes. He’s been looking for her all his life.  I indulge him, pamper him…love him. There is nothing I will not do for him. I hold him and pet him when he needs it. But do not think I am his mother…no, I am his lover. He is not my baby though sometimes he wants to be. I chide him over this. He will become helpless if you let him. He won’t be able to put on his shorts.”

Billy grinned, “He is helpless. He likes for me to dress him.”

“Ah, see, that I will not do. I help him with his shoes if they have laces. He cannot bend anymore.”

“I knew him before the accident. Back when he was married to Charlie.”

“You knew him after he lost his virginity then?”

“Yes, you took it, didn’t you?”

“I did. God, what a night that was. I waited ten years for that. He has not changed that much since then. He wants, he needs attention and love. He needs security and devotion.”

“He gets that here.”

“I believe he does. Mandi adds that spark he needs, that edge. He likes an edge. That is why I worry about him going with strangers. I did get onto him about that. He told me about the boy in Nantes. It was a dumb thing for him to do. Still he is unrepentant.

“I’m glad he got on the airship.”

“Hm, yes. Keep an eye on him, Billy.”

“Oh, I do that.”

“Now, where is Mandi?”

Billy hesitated. “She’s in London.”

“You don’t want him to know where. Why is this?”

“When she wants him she’ll let him know.”

Ali smiled, “That will not do. I need to know where she is. I will go see her and send her home.”

“She’s been hurt.”

“Not physically?”

“No, more in the heart region.”

“You are a very perceptive and caring person. You love them both, don’t you?”

“Yes, I’d have to say that was true. We both love Blaine.”

“That is the pain we all share." Ali looked him in the eyes.

Billy could see and feel the pull he had. He was very strong in every way. Like Blaine he was sensual, the way he moved and spoke, the way he used his body when he talked.

“You did not leave him yet you suffered the same.”

“No, maybe I’m a coward."

“Or maybe you knew he would need you.”

Billy shrugged. “I need him.”

“How fortunate you are. You can have him when you want him.” Ali closed his eyes for a moment. “Let us join him in the garden, but first I will have Mandi’s address.”

Billy gave it. There was nothing else he could do.

Lyssa was making a playhouse with branches and sticks. She came over to Ali and was picked up and kissed but she was intent on her house. Blaine moved to Ali’s side and his arm went around Blaine.

“Shall we find you a seat?” he asked Blaine.

“No, I’m standing all right.”

“Don’t push it for my benefit.”

“I am not.” They rounded a stand of hedges and Ali turned him and kissed him, taking his weight and letting the canes fall at his sides. He held him closely.

“How I envy your Billy.”

“No…it’s not the same, Ali.”

“At least he loves you. Yes, he does, he shares the pain of loving you.”

“Why am I such a pain?”

Ali smiled, “That is just the way you are and don’t change.”

His eyes said it all when he looked at Ali.

Ali backed off. “Stand!”

“I am.”

“Without me holding you. Stand on your own.”

Blaine braced his legs and looked down where his canes had fallen. He could not get to them by himself.

“You can do it.”

“Not for very long. I don’t have the strength.”

“You have strength, here inside of you.” Ali moved back to him and took his arms to steady him. “You can draw on that strength when you want to. Why do you not use it?” He bent down and picked up Blaine’s canes and put them in his hands. "You should use the straps on your wrists so they do not fall. There might not always be someone nearby to pick them up.”

“You are telling me I should become more independent. Mandi is already gone. Do you think Billy is next? Am I to be alone?”

“No…no, Blaine. For you, yourself you need this. You have become so dependent…like a child and this is not good for you. Mandi is not gone, she is merely away. It is good I came here today to see how you live in this house. It is a good house. You have done much with the gardens. This is a good life. You work when you wish and you have playtime as well. You have a lovely daughter who needs you. You are surrounded by people who love you. There is not much more in this life, you know?  You say you have put the past behind you now and that is good. Now, Blaine darling, you can live.”

“Yes.” He took a step. “I have to learn how to do that all over again. I’ve tried without success here. Always that shadow followed me. I have sent the shadow back to China. Still I have thoughts of Hong Kong. I was happy there even though I was alone. I filled my days. My life was less complicated. If I wanted company I paid for it. Here I want company and still I pay…oh, it is not the same but they are in my employ. I wonder sometimes if I didn’t pay them would they leave me. Billy is like my right arm. I cannot do without him. I love him, Ali.”

“He is a good partner to you. He is…he cares for you and your welfare and he loves you. I do not think he stays for the money, however, he must have money as we all do. I never think of it. It is there and more than I will ever use. I have no idea how much money I have. “Let me set up a fund for him. He will be independent of you and I think it will benefit both of you.”

“Oh, Ali, I am already your ward.”

“My ward? Hah! No, darling, I only got you started with seed money. The rest you have done on your own.”

“It was Charlie’s money, too, that helped. I can never repay you.”

“I would be angry if I thought you wanted to. I’ve not mentioned Mandi. I don’t know what you pay her but why don’t you marry her?”

“I’ve offered. Through some misunderstanding on the Medea she wanted to leave us in Spain. She was determined to go back to work and make her own way. I persuaded her not to do this, that I loved her and could not do without her. I offered to marry her then and she said no, she would not ask that of me.”

“That would solve the problem of paying her. She would have access to what you make available for her. It might also help with another problem. You would not be free to do as you please with someone else. In other words, you would be true to her and to Billy. No more one night stands in Nantes or anywhere else. I know what you are thinking but it will not do, Blaine. I won’t allow it.”

Blaine sat down on a bench and looked over at Ali. “It was a one off thing. I am not looking for one night stands. I don’t know why I did it. I was strongly attracted to him. Perhaps it was the place and the atmosphere. He was leaving and I knew I would never see him again. I really did not have a thought for anything but him. I know that is wrong. It was wrong to leave Mandi and Billy out there without a clue about me.”

“Was he that good?”

“No, but there was something about him, something exciting and he was beautiful. He was about to embark on an adventure and I envied him. He tried to get me to go with him but I couldn’t do that. I felt it was committing suicide.”

“Ah, well, that is something.”

Blaine half smiled. “Surprise, eh?” Blaine looked at Ali for a moment, his eyes burnt with tears then he looked away.

Ali’s hand closed over his on the bench and his own eyes smarted. Blaine had let go of something.

They could hear Billy calling Lyssa to lunch.

“Shall we go in and see what Billy has prepared?” Blaine suggested and regained his composure.

“Yes.” He helped Blaine to his feet. “I can think of you here in this place. They will be good thoughts.”

Later that day Ali spoke to Billy about setting up a fund for him to draw from as he needed.

“This is not charity, this is a gift. It frees you from him.”

“I don’t know what to say." Billy ran a hand through his hair. “It’s not the money. I don’t stay for that.”

“I am aware of that.”

“We kind of depend on each other. I don’t think I could ever leave him unless he turned me out. Wow…I suppose I should say thank you. It’s a very generous offer.”

“And well deserved, Billy.” Ali put an arm around Billy’s shoulder and hugged him.

Part 6

Ali looked out the window of the limo at the apartment building. He asked his driver to come back in an hour.

Mandi lit a candle and turned on the CD player. She’d been shopping for some music. The doorbell sent her reeling. No one knew about this place but Billy. She hesitated and then opened the door a slit to see who was there. You could have knocked her over with a feather.

“Ali.”

“May I come in?”

“Yes, of course! Blaine is…?”

“At home. I just left him.” He took her hand then her arm and she went into his arms for a hug and a rather sexy kiss. “It is good to see you, Mandi.”

“And you.” She ran a hand down his face. “It is good to see you.”

“Who’s place is this?”

“It’s mine and Billy’s. I know that must sound a bit strange but we’ve just bought it. It’s a place we can come when we need to…recharge our batteries. Sometimes you need a place to go…away.”

“Away from Blaine?”

“Yes. Not that we don’t love him because we do but…”

“He has hurt you.”

“Yes, he has. It’s his thoughtlessness, like I don’t matter, I'm not important to him. If I try to leave him he…he won’t let me. He says he loves me, can’t live without me and yet he can walk away for a night without a word or even with you for this week. He didn’t even call to see about his daughter. That’s not good, Ali.”

“No, indeed it is not. He knows this.”

“He might know it but he’s not sorry. I could just shake him sometimes.”

“Why don’t you do it? Give him a good shake…don’t run away but confront him and make him see…make him apologize. He needs this, Mandi. Don’t let him have his way all the time. He needs  guidelines and you can do this for him. Perhaps I am to blame for this week. I don’t see him enough and when I can, make no mistake he is mine. He can and has had the opportunity to call home and I do agree that this is not acceptable behavior. I myself have contacted my own family this week. He needs a little work, Mandi.”

She pulled away from him and walked over to a window that overlooked the River Thames. “I was going to come home in a couple of days.”

“Why wait? You both know what the problem is. Why wait?”

“I…I was a little afraid. I said some things to him…he  might not want me back.”

“Ah, now you know this is not the truth.” He moved behind her and put his arms around her waist. “He cannot get on without you for long. He needs you. You make his life complete. With you he can be strong, he is a man. Give him a reason to be strong for you. I know you and I know you can do this for him as no other can.” He turned her in his arms.

Mandi leaned into him, letting him hold her and run his hands up her back and across her bottom. She slipped her hands around his waist inside of his jacket. “Ali,” she said against his chest. "I wish you didn’t live so far away.”

Ali smiled, “Far away in more ways than one.” He lifted her chin and kissed her.

One thing led to another and they ended up in bed.

“Oh, Mandi.” He held her and kissed her head. “I must go, my driver will be waiting.” He began to dress. "You will go home?”

“Yes, Ali, I will. Not much will be served by my staying here. Thank you for coming by.”

“I have made a day of it, first Blaine and Billy and now you,” he smiled and touched her face.

“What did you think of Billy?” she asked.

“He is a love, a treasure, and is good for Blaine. Is he good for you?” He raised a brow.

“He is my best friend and only occasional lover. He’s not really into women but once in a while, you know, it happens.”

“I know you and Blaine have your problems but they are not insurmountable. They are small things compared to the big thing that you share. Go home to him and love him tonight. Have you thought of marrying him?”

“He’s asked but I don’t need that."

“Maybe he does. Think about that.”

She tilted her head. “Really?”

“He married Charlie. I think he does need it. It grounds him…it was a thought.” He looked around to make sure he had everything. “Now I must go.” He kissed her again. “I will see Blaine one last night and then I return him to you. Tomorrow night is my last night here. I would like to see him.”

“Of course. I’m sure he’ll be with you. Good bye, Ali.” She kissed him and let him go.

After he left she took a shower and dawdled about for awhile, blew out her candle and locked the door.

It was dark when she pulled up to the house. A glance at the clock on her dash said 8:10. She let herself into the kitchen. All was cleaned and only a light from the cooker sent a glow across the room. She walked through the rooms downstairs, a few lights left on but no one in the rooms.

She took a breath and climbed the stairs. A light was on under Lyssa’s door and she tip toed past it. She could hear Blaine’s voice reading to her. At the far end of the hall was a sitting room and she looked in there. Billy had the TV on with his feet propped up.

“Billy,” she said quietly.

“Oh, love, you’ve come home,”

“No, don’t get up. I’ve come home. Is, um, everything all right?”

“It is now,” he smiled and pulled her hand. “He’ll be so happy to see you.”

“I hope so. I had a visit from Ali.”

“So did we all.”

“What did you think of him?”

“I see why Blaine’s hooked on him. He’s, um, yeah.”

Mandi smiled, “Yes, he is.”

“You don’t mind about me giving him the address? He’s not mentioned it to Blaine.”

“No, I don’t mind. It’s hard to keep things from Ali.”

She heard him close the door to Lyssa’s room and walk down the hall to his suite. She looked at Billy. “Wish me luck.”

“Go get ‘em , love.”

Mandi opened his door. He’d  gone into his dressing room. She walked to the door and he turned around and looked at her.

“Are you back or…visiting?” he asked.

“I’m back.”

“I  have to wonder what that means in Mandi-speak. Have you come to your senses and come home or are you waiting for a reason to leave again. If you are, then leave now and don’t come back. I can’t take this, Mandi. I have to know where you are.”

“I’m here, here where I want to be. You’d better be sure you want me here because if you do then there are some things that go with that. I have to be important to you, important enough that you pick up a phone and say hello, I love you. I don’t care where you are or who you are with, you can call me and say that if it’s true.”

“I do love you and I’m afraid to love you.”

“I like to hear the words. I spill them all over you often enough, at least you can do the same for me.”

“I…say the words. That’s not what this is about.”

“No, it isn’t. It’s shutting me out, forgetting that I’m here. It’s going away for five days and not giving me a thought. I’m not even going to bring up Lyssa and Billy. I know where you were and who you were with. Ali Is acceptable but even Ali doesn’t go a week without calling home. You have no excuses. I expect better of you and I will have it.”

Blaine tilted his head and looked at her in amazement.

“I expect to be treated with respect. I am, for all appearances, the acting mother to your daughter. I’m your acting wife. I’m not someone to be tossed aside when something interesting comes along. So you’d better be thinking about me…you’d better be…” She bit her lip.

“I’ve asked you before if you wanted to marry.”

“I think I’ve changed my mind. I want your name and your protection and your love.”

“You have it.” He moved from the round cushion  where he’d been standing to stand in front of her. “Will you marry me? I won’t ask again, Mandi.”

“Yes, yes, I will. I need you.” Her arms went around his neck. “You are so special to me. I’ve never known anyone like you. I want to belong to you and you to me.”

“I feel like you already belong to me.”  He dropped his canes and put his arms around her waist. "That’s why when you go away part of me is missing. I’ll never be the man you deserve, Mandi. There is something, something twisted inside of me. I spent most of my life denying it, trying to hide it and trying to be someone I was not. You are the only woman who has ever accepted me as I am, who loves me in spite of me.” He smiled a little. His voice dropped down. “You are the only one I can love.

“I accept your conditions without question. Accept mine…you will never leave me. That is all I ask.”

“I won’t leave you. If I go away for a day that is not leaving you. Sometimes I need some space. It’s hard to think when I am with you. You take all my senses away.”

“I feed on them.” His hands moved up her back. “I want you.”

“Hold on to me, this way so I can take some of your weight.” She began to walk backwards with him. Slowly and hesitantly he stepped in front of her, never breaking eye contact. He walked this way from his dressing room to the bed. Mandi could see in his eyes that he’d accomplished something he hadn’t done before. She turned him so he could have the bed behind him and she began to undress him. He took over and did it himself. She helped him sit and then he began to undress her.

“You wear too many clothes,” he said softly.

“I’ve been out in public. Tell me what you want me to discard.”

“This and this so that when I touch you I can feel…you.”

She moved between his legs and kissed him.

Later Billy went about, turning out the lights and locking up. He looked in on Blaine and Mandi for a moment and then quietly closed the door.

“That was Billy,” she whispered. “He’s a part of us, too.”

“He has to be, Mandi. I’m sorry. I wish I could…”

“No.” She placed a finger over his lips. “Don’t wish. We have it all. I wouldn’t want you to be any different than you are. You are who I love. You. Billy loves you, too. We both do.

Mandi woke in bed with him. He was still asleep and she carefully moved a curl form his forehead. He’d had a haircut, some expensive expert in London that Ali had provided. His nails were manicured and had a coat of clear polish. She would have liked to examine every part of him while he slept but it was time to get up. Lyssa would be awake. She carefully eased out of the bed and had a last look at him. She’d let him take the lead through the night and sometimes that lead led her to make love to him while he lay back, basking in sensations. He was something else in bed. She smiled and reached for her clothes.

An hour later Billy opened Blaine’s door. He was awake but still in bed.

“I can’t get up,” Blaine said. “Canes are in the dressing room.”

“How did you get here then?”

“I walked with Mandi.”

“You should do more of that.” Billy went into the dressing room and found his canes. While Blaine was in the bathroom he threw the covers back on the bed and thought he’d strip it down and do some laundry. The sheets certainly needed changing. He heard Blaine come back into the bedroom.

“What did you do in here last night? Look at this bed!”

“You should have joined us.”

“You needed that time with her.”

“Don’t ever hesitate, Billy.”

“Oh, no, I wouldn’t…really.”

Blaine tossed his canes on the bed and turned Billy around. “You lie…you lie to me.” He kissed him. “We’re going to marry. Nothing is going to change here with us, with you and me and Mandi. Nothing. I cannot legally marry you both or I would. Do you understand?”

“I think so.” Billy rested his hands on Blaine’s waist. “I’m glad you’re marrying her. That’s good.”

“Yes, it is. Where is my household?”

“Mandi is giving Lyssa breakfast. I came up to check on you.”

“You have on too many clothes. You wear too many layers.” His eyes held Billy until he agreed.

Later Billy came down with the laundry. Mandi grabbed a few kitchen towels and went into the laundry room with him. She backed him against the wall. “You’ve been making love with my future husband.”

“I have, yes. I’m so happy for you, Mandi.”

“Me, too.” She kissed him softly. "One day soon you and I will gang up on him.”

“Yeah, we can do that,” he blinked.

She smiled and backed off. “I love you, Billy.” She left him to sort himself out with the laundry.

The car arrived for Blaine at 2:00 that afternoon. He kissed them all and said he would not call but that he would be home in the morning.

Mandi and Billy waved goodbye, Billy holding Lyssa until he was out of sight.

“Well, that’s that,” he said and put the little girl down.

“Let’s go into the village to the park. Lyssa would like that. We might get an ice cream,” Mandi suggested.

“A fine idea,” Billy agreed.

Part 7

The car was waiting and still Ali had problems letting him go. He straightened his tie and his collar, brushed the shoulders of his jacket. His room was still dimly lit.

“You are to be married…again.”

“Again and for the last time.”

“I wish…I wish that I could attend but…Blaine, I do not know when I will see you again. Security is such that travel outside of our country right now presents a problem for many people. I am only here because of my brother. Travel to our country is even more restricted.”

“I should be used to this by now, a brief encounter and then nothing.”

“It is different for you now. You have a life, a full life to be lived and I believe you will live it.”

“Have you ever thought, Ali, what would happen if you and I just disappeared like the boy on the airship, walked away from everything and everybody we know…together?”

“You like fantasy. My family would be taken and held until I returned. Power would shift in the wrong direction."

“For me…nothing would change. People would soon forget who I was or if I ever was.”

“Tell that to Mandi. Tell your daughter to forget she ever had a father. You are better than this.”

“It’s not something I would ever do. I only asked if you ever thought of it. Obviously you do not.”

“I did for awhile when I was first taken from you. I had wild thoughts of running away and finding you. I even made some plans how we would travel. But, no…Blaine, it was never meant to be. There is something called responsibility that settles upon us. It weighs heavy but we learn to carry it. You have in turn carried it and escaped it and handled it badly over the years.”

“I know that is true. I know it is time I stepped up and shouldered my share. I have people I love that depend on me. I won’t let them down, not ever again.”

“You are standing on your own two feet and looking me in the eye.  I love it when you are strong like this.” Ali kissed him, his hand still on the back of Blaine’s neck. “Well, you must go. We will keep in touch.”

“Yes, thank you for everything you are, for what you are to me and have been to me. I love you, Ali.” Blaine kissed him deeply and then parted. He smiled a little and touched Ali’s face. A shadow passed between them. Had Ali noticed? Blaine did. He frowned a little and then broke away, picked up his canes and left.

The ride home in the limo seemed long. He had time to notice the scenery along the roadside once they got off the expressway. The countryside was so green and lush. Spring had come. When had it come and he’d missed it’s coming? The long voyage on the Medea had taken up most of it. The Medea…he’d settled a score and washed his hands of it in the Mediterranean.  Then it took him to Nantes and he realized now what had happened to him there. He’d let go of the past and all that it meant to him. He would never be that young man again with his naïve expectations and insecurities, never again spin himself into a silk cocoon of protection against the world. He’d been cast out of that and reborn into reality. Like Ali said, he had a life to live.

No more false starts and stops. Now he had a home and family. He would make Mandi his wife and the mother of his daughter. Perhaps there might even be more children in the future. It occurred to him that he might want Billy’s child. He smiled a little at the thought of Mandi having his child.

He let his mind wander over everything except Ali. Somehow that was too painful, too fresh a wound to open up so soon.  Parting was always hard, this time especially hard.

“Let me out here,” he told the driver at the foot of his drive. He wanted to walk and breathe the air, listen to the birds and the insects. He wanted to take it all in. This bit of air, this green, this gravel beneath his feet was his. His world was centered here and never before had he felt the pull as he did walking up the drive.  If he could, he would have run all the way to the door of his home.

As he neared the house he noticed the front windows were open on the first two floors. He could hear music and the high-pitched sound of his daughter’s voice. Home.

“Where in the world did you spring from? I never heard the car.” Billy rose from the dining room table where he’d been reading the papers. “Welcome home.” He gave Blaine a hug and a kiss.

There was something different about Blaine. Billy could see it in his eyes, even the way he held himself. “They’re in the kitchen making a mess,” Billy told him.

“It’s good to be home,” Blaine said and hugged Billy back.

He went to the kitchen with Billy following behind him.  “Careful on the tiles.”

“David!” Mandi’s face lit up. “When did you…?”

“Just now. I walked up the drive. Hello, baby.” He hugged Lyssa and kissed Mandi on the lips. “I’m home.”

“I see that.” Mandi lifted her chin. “You are, aren’t you?”

“What are you making?”

“Vanilla biscuits. I’m doing the rolling and Lyssa is doing the cutting.”

“I see. May I?” he asked Lyssa.

“You haveta wash first.”

He smiled, went to the kitchen sink and washed his hands.

Mandi looked over their bent heads at Billy. Their eyes met and they shook their heads slightly.

A little later Billy made tea. Mandi was sweeping up the tiles and Lyssa playing at doing the washing up of the shaped cutters on a chair at the sink. The vanilla biscuits were beginning to scent the air. This was his world and he sat the kitchen worktable and relished it. No, there wasn’t silence or a tinkling of wind chimes or scented candles burning but there was a silence of the heart and spirit, a quieting of the senses into contentment. He was content and he could be happy within that contentment.

“Oh, David, you’ve got flour on your new slacks!" Mandi went to brushing them off with a towel.

He made a little movement with his head. “It does not matter.” He reached out and touched the jug of roses she’d put back on the table after cleaning up the dough and flour.

“These are the old garden roses. I must identify each and every one this spring while they are in bloom and take photos.”

Mandi looked at them. “They smell wonderful, not like modern hybrids with little scent. I wonder who planted them.”

“My father did.” He looked up at Mandi. “He loved to garden.”

He pushed himself up from his chair and grabbed his canes. “Lyssa, take me out to the garden to count the roses.”

She rushed from her watery job to join her father.

Billy watched him walk across the patio with her. “What ya reckon?”

“He’s come home at last…to us. I don’t know all about it but that I did sense. He’s ours, Billy.”

“Let’s make sure we take damn good care of him so he don’t want to wander again.”

Mandi smiled, “We can do that. You know, you asked me what kind of a wedding I wanted to have and I know I could have anything in the world but I want it simple. I want it outside and I want you and Margret and Lyssa to be there and Cramer. I want him to see with his own eyes that it’s a done deal and to leave me alone.”

Billy went over to her and hugged her waist. I’ll be sure and tell him that, too. What about your family, Mandi?”

“I’ll take him around after it’s all done. We’ll meet at the local pub where they gather and I’ll introduce him as my husband and then I don’t expect to see them on my doorstep. We’re all grown up and scattered now. Mum and Dad wouldn’t understand our arrangement at all so it’s best they are not exposed to it.”

“All right.”

“We could have it here in the garden. It would be lovely, don’t you think?”

Billy looked out over the patio and beyond. “I could do some fairy lights in the hedges. You will have a dress.”

“Oh…I don’t...."

“I do. I see you in lace, pale candlelight lace.”

“Lace…really?”

“Really.”

“I believe you are a romantic, Billy.”

They were lying across Blaine’s bed, all three of them.

“Lace and gardens and fairy lights,” he smiled, propped up on an arm.

“Just at dusk when the sun is past the garden wall. It would be lovely,” Billy said.

“It’s such a small group I thought we might even have it on the patio.” Mandi looked at Blaine.

“Why not under the rose archway?” he suggested.

“That would be beautiful. The yellow roses would be…we haven’t set a date.”

Blaine tossed out his phone so they could bring up a calendar. He felt warm and loved in their presence.

“How long before they are at their peak?” she asked.

He rolled his eyes upward. “About two weeks. That’s not much time.”

“We can swing it,” Billy said.

“Oh, the license…”

“I’ve got that already.”

“When did you?’

“In London.”

Mandi smiled and reached out for his hand.  “I still can’t believe that I’m getting married. I always said I never would. I thought there wasn’t a man out there that could give me what I wanted, what I needed, and I didn’t want to settle for whatever. I never wanted to end up like my parents with a houseful of kids and no money and fighting and yelling all the time.”

Blaine looked at her a moment. “What is it you think you’re getting here?”

“Here? Everything I could ever want. If there was only you I could spend the rest of my life satisfied. There are all the little ins and outs of you to figure out. But there’s more, there’s Billy,” she reached for his hand, too,  “and already a little girl. There’s a home.”

“What if there are more children?” He rolled over on his stomach and looked down at her on her back. “Would you have Billy’s child?”

She smiled, “Well, that would be up to Billy. She felt his hand tighten on hers and she looked over at him.

“Not sure I could father a child but…I’d be willing to give it a go.”

Blaine laughed a little, “You’d give it a go, eh? Ah, Billy, I want to have your baby. How does that sound?”

“I like the sound of that.” Billy met his gaze. They kissed gently above Mandi’s breast. “Let’s wait until after the ceremony,” he said with a little grin, “make it legal and all that.”

Blaine smiled, “All right. Now off with the both of you. I had little sleep last night and I’m tired.”

Mandi sat up a little and kissed him good night. “I love you,” she said.

“I love you.” He watched her slide from the bed and go out to her own room.

“Will you need anything else tonight?” Billy rolled off the bed.

“A kiss good-night.”

“You’ve got it.” Billy kissed him and pulled his blankets from beneath him. “Want to have my baby?”

“What do you think of that? Can you, will you?”

“I can and will. She’ll have to go off the pill. It may take some time. I don’t think she was planning on that, Blaine.”

“I had to ask her. I want it but in the end it’s up to you and Mandi.”

“What about you?”

“I have a child. I don’t feel the need to produce more of me. But if it should happen…I don’t want to load her down with children unless she wants them. She’s not just for breeding.” He grinned a little.

“No, indeed, and she’ll be the first to tell you that.” He dropped the blanket across Blaine’s legs. “Well, I’ll let you get your beauty sleep in. Night, Blaine.”

“Good night, Billy.” Blaine turned over in his bed, knowing he was not alone, just by himself.

Billy started down the hall and stopped at Mandi’s door, pushed it open a little. “Open?”

“Come in.”

“Well,  what do you really think about that? If you don’t want to, Mandi, then it’s not on. Just because he wants something doesn’t make it so.”

“Actually I kind of like the idea. The only thing is, he would be the father. You know it would have to be that way.”

“That’s all right with me. I’d be there, you know.”

“It would be as it is with Lyssa.”

“We’re a family and the only one I’ve ever really had. However it’s made up is all right with me, like I said. I’m a part of it.”

“You want to sleep with me? We don’t have to do anything, just be close.”

“You don’t mind?”

“No. You know regardless of what David has taught us, bed is not all about sex.”

“Right…well, look at him tonight.”

“I know but then he’s just left Ali. Enough pillows?”

“Just the right amount.” He turned out the light. “Night, Mandi.”

“Mmm, night, Billy.”

ON TO NINE POUND TEN

BACK TO THE MEDEA STEAMPUNK'D

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