By Atonia Walpole
(Picture creations also by Atonia)
Part 1 - Best Intentions
In less than a week after arriving in Portsmouth Captain Jack Aubrey and Catherine Lewis were on the newly built docks in London. They’d come up by a packet from Portsmouth and Jack was seeing to the unloading of their trunks and hiring a hackney cab to take them into the city. It was for this sort of thing, Catty reminded herself, that she did need someone with her. Despite her protestations Jack had traveled with her to London. She had thought perhaps he might be eager to return to Ashgrove and to his family but he had promised her and he would fulfill his promise. Still unsure of her place in his life, she accepted his company and was glad for it.
It was the back end of July and the city was close and odorous. Catty held a handkerchief to her nose as they rode through the city to the Whitecap Inn, a clean establishment Jack had used many times.
“I didn’t know it would be so…so unclean,” she observed as they rode.
“Makes you wonder why anyone would desire to remain here, but it is a place of business, Catty, as you will see later.”
He checked them in to the inn and they went down for a meal. “The food is good. I’ve stayed here before.”
“I thought men stayed at their club when in London,” she smiled, “but then I don’t know what men really do, only that Henri did when he traveled here.”
“You did not come with him?”
“No, I was not asked to come. I believe it had to do with Jean and his school, or perhaps it was when his uncle died.” She looked at the roasted fowl placed before them and a trencher of boiled vegetables.
Tomorrow we shall visit The Bank of England and your solicitor.”
“I haven’t a solicitor.…”
“His name was on the papers you wrapped so well in oilcloth.”
“I feel so stupid. I know nothing of business or banks or solicitors.”
“Not to worry, I do. Now will this suffice?” He placed a large piece of meat on her plate.
Jack had taken two rooms at the inn but barely had he dropped her at her door before he was knocking ever so quietly.
“Jack?” Her eyes widened.
“I have been near you for nineteen days, Catty, and unable to.…” He took her in his arms and kissed her.
“I wasn’t sure you wanted me again,” she said breathlessly.
“Not want you…I am on fire for you.” He pressed her against him, nearly taking the breath from her.
She awoke alone in the bed the next morning. Stretching like a well fed cat, she pulled the pillow he’d lain on to her and hugged it. He’d told her she was made for love but it was him, she thought, that brought out that wildness in her. As much as she’d loved her husband it had never been like this.
Bathed and dressed in the one dress she’d had made in Portsmouth, she waited for him to come.
He took her to the solicitor’s office first where he did most of the talking and presented her papers. The solicitor read them through and looked up at her. “You have some means of identifying yourself?”
“I’m afraid not. I was on the Adele and I lost everything,” she answered.
“The ship sank in route from Grenada. I can verify that as my ship rescued her from the wreck of the Maiden. We also took on board one other survivor who has since died. I knew Miss Lewis in St. Georges and her father and brother. Jean Latrouix is a friend of mine.”
“Captain Jack Aubrey, I’ve heard of you. I believe you’ve also been through our courts.”
Jack cleared his throat. “I have been on several occasions.”
“Well, sir, I see no problems with this transfer of property to Miss Lewis. It will have to go before the courts since there is a title entailed.”
“Title?” Catty questioned.
“Yes, Lord Latrouix's title passed to Jean Latrouix and therefore to you, Lady Lewis.”
“How long before I may take possession of the estate?”
He scratched his head. “I’ll endeavor to get my request to the courts this afternoon. However it will not be in session for three days.”
“I see. There is no way to speed this up? Miss Lewis is staying in an inn here in London and is most anxious to travel to her home.”
“I’ll see what I can do but I make no promises. Where may I send a message to you?”
“The Whitecap Inn,” Jack replied.
“Very well. You might spend your time wisely by inquiring about a staff. The house has been closed for the past four years.”
Staff, Catty thought. She had no idea how to go about this. Greenlees had been staffed by slaves.
Jack hailed a hackney to take her back to the inn. “I will join you later, my dear. I, too, have business to attend.”
Jack searched out Stephen in his usual habitat in London and joined him for lunch.
“Where is the lovely Miss Lewis?” Stephen asked.
“I sent her along to the inn. We’ve been to see the solicitor about her inheritance this morning and it may be as much as three days before it is, in fact, in her hands. Delays, delays which I cannot afford.”
“You mean to see her at Meadowfields before traveling to Ashgrove?”
“Yes, I do. The house has been closed for four years without staff. I’m afraid Miss Lewis is unfamiliar with hiring.”
“I’m sure there are any number of people who would be happy to assist her. Why have you taken it upon yourself?”
“In some ways I feel responsible for her. I’ve told her about my marriage, of course, but I am not done with her nor will I be.”
Stephen picked up his glass. “Would you like a piece of advice?”
Jack looked up from his plate. “I’m not sure it’s something I want to hear.”
“Do you remember what happened with Lord Nelson and Lady Hamilton?”
Jack paused his fork. “I am not such a public person and my importance is nothing compared to his. I can’t imagine Miss Lewis and myself being a subject of conversation.”
“You have ambition, my friend. Someday you wish to be an admiral. Your life will come under scrutiny then and having a mistress will be out in the open for all to see. You can’t keep her hidden. You’ve never been particularly good at that anyway. You are not by nature a deceitful fellow.”
“What would you have me do? If left to her own devices she would be swallowed up in no time at all, taken advantage of or worse. I mean to protect her until such time as she can manage on her own. I do not mean to make her my mistress.”
“Ah, a guardian, perhaps? Is that how you see it?”
“Yes, more along those lines. Guardian for all love. She needs one.”
Arriving back at the inn, Catty removed her dress and donned her skirt and shirtwaist. She had a good look at the ill-fitting dress she’d just removed and, disgusted, tossed it on the bed. She went downstairs for her lunch and asked the landlady about a seamstress.
“Wal, there’s a gal was apprentice to Miss ‘amilton’s seamstress. I’m told she’s out now. I’ll think of ‘er name directly.”
“Thank you. I really need someone to sew an entire wardrobe. All my things were lost at sea.”
“Glender was ‘er name, I’m thinkin’. Lived o’re back o’ Bond. If yer want, I’ll send ‘round for ‘er.”
“Yes, I would love that. Thanks again.” Catty smiled, feeling better already.
An hour later a very thin, gray-skinned young woman appeared downstairs at the inn. The landlady climbed the stairs for Catty.
“She’s a mite worse for wear. Been in t’gaol, she has.”
“In jail? For what?” Catty asked, following down the stairs.
“Stealin'. T’was ole Miss that got ‘er out.”
The woman curtsied and bowed her head, clutching a well-worn tapestry bag.
“Stand up an’ speak fer yer selve,” she was admonished.
“Glenda Pooley, ma’am,” she said nervously.
“I’m Catherine Lewis. You are a seamstress?”
“Yes, ma’am. I do good work.”
“Did you make your own clothes?” Catty noticed the cut of her jacket and the needlework down the front.
“Yes, ma’am.”
“Please sit down.” Catty talked with her for awhile then invited her upstairs to her room.
“I have this dress, hastily done up in Portsmouth. What do you think of it? It doesn’t fit, by the by.”
Glenda went over the seams and clucked her tongue. “I could maybe take it apart and make something of it that would do, if ma’am wishes?”
“I do wish. It’s the only suitable thing I have for London. My clothes were lost at sea.”
Glenda eyed the shirtwaist Catty was wearing. “That be done by seamen, I’m thinking.”
“Yes, it was and the skirt also from what was left of the dress I was wearing.” Catty looked down at her clothes.
“They do fine work…some of ‘em.” Glenda opened her bag for her sewing things and set about taking apart the unsuitable dress and remaking it.
Catty watched her sure, quick fingers fly over the fabric, fitting and re-cutting, changing the design slightly for a more stylish look. Catty told her about her new home she was going to in a few days.
“I’ve not seen it and know nothing about it and somehow I have to hire a staff to run it. I’m from the West Indies and know nothing about such things.”
“If you’d trust me, ma’am, I do know some people that’d be looking for another position like.”
“Who are these people, Glenda?”
“There’s cook down to Hennessy’s can’t sup with the new butler. There’s Lissa over to Butler’s, trying to get away from the Lord. She be a maid of work.” She went on and on naming over people she knew were looking for a new place to work.
“Why, I could staff the whole place with people you know. Tell me, Glenda, why were you in the gaol?”
“I stole a scrap of fabric.” She never looked up from her sewing.
“Why did you steal it?”
“To make a shirtwaist for me boy.”
“You have a child?”
“He be comin’ on twelve now.”
“Where is he?”
“I dunno. He went to sea in one of His Majesty’s ships. He were a beautiful child, Ma’am, like his da.”
“You’re married?”
“No, never were. His da be a seaman. Called ‘im Lofty cause he were always climbing up high. No fear of heights has he.”
“The father is called Lofty?”
“No, me son. The father’s long dead now.”
“I’ve seen your son. He’s on the Surprise. Long blond curly hair? Oh!” Catty clapped her hands. “You must come with me to Meadowfields, Glenda.”
A quick smiled and her head was lowered over her work again. “I’m much obliged, ma’am.”
Catty smiled back. It was so good to have another woman to talk to. She could hardly wait for Jack to return and tell him she’d solved her staffing problem.
Part 2 – Meadowfields
“But you can’t be serious, Catty. You only met the woman this day, straight from the gaol. How do you know these people she mentioned aren’t the same…thieves and…?” Jack was astonished.
“They are working now. If they were thieves surely their masters would have long gotten rid of them. Don’t you see how right it is that Glenda Pooley is Lofty’s mother and she’s now my seamstress and that she knows all these people because she’s worked in all the great houses in London. I’m sure servants talk amongst themselves.”
“I knew his father, an able seaman lost around the Horn in a great storm years ago.”
“They will be coming around tomorrow a few at a time for me to interview for work.”
“I’ll not have you interviewing a lot of….”
“But I must! If I’m to live with them under my roof we must all get along and if I don’t meet them, how will I know?”
“Catty,” he gathered her in his arms, “I will sit with you and ask the questions that must be asked.”
For the next three days they interviewed cook, housekeeper, maids, scullery maids, gardeners, footmen, stablemen, until Jack was exhausted with the whole thing. She had her staff and they were told to make ready to leave London for Meadowfields. On the fourth morning a messenger arrived from the solicitor’s office and after paying a call and walking out with the necessary deeds she went to the Bank of England and collected some of the money that was there for her. She would need it to get the house and grounds going again. Jack went with her to purchase a carriage and four horses, plus two for riding. Livestock would be bought locally once she was there.
Her servants had already been sent on ahead to make the house habitable when she and Jack set off for Meadowfields.
Catty rode in the carriage and Jack on horseback part of the time and part riding with her. “Look…” she leaned out of the window, “the sky has already cleared.”
Jack looked up, seeing blue sky and white clouds. Gone was the smoke from London. “Take a deep breath,” he smiled and rode up by the coachman, Tom Bailey, giving directions and setting off out front of them.
Catty settled back in her carriage. He didn’t know it but the servants thought he was her husband. She smiled a little to herself and pretended he was. They had addressed him as Captain but she’d heard the footman mention something about the Master would be riding the black horse. If it could only be true, she thought, for she was as much in love with him as she had been Henri…perhaps more so. He was totally different, a man who commanded and feared no man. Henri had been out of necessity subservient to his father and it used to make her angry to hear the way his father talked to him.
They stopped at a coaching inn for the night. “I’m afraid we shall have to share a bed. There was only one room to let by itself, unless you prefer me to sleep with the rest of the men in the long room?”
“Don’t be silly,” she grinned from under her bonnet and gathered her skirts to get out of the carriage.
“Quite right. It would have been a waste of a bed anyway.” He slipped his arm around her and lifted her from the carriage.
She was spooned against him after their lovemaking. “Jack…I love you. Is it so wrong for me to love you?”
He kissed her bare shoulder. “No, my dear, for you it is not.”
“Do you love me just a little?”
“I love you more than just a little, much more.” He kissed her neck. And he did. It was his problem and somehow he had to deal with it. He had not intended to fall in love with her, not when he met her in St. Georges and left her behind. It was only when he saw her on the Surprise that he realized his feelings were much more than skin deep. Now of course he was in too deep to get out and he didn’t want to, not really. Call it what he may, protector, guardian, he was her lover and she was his mistress. He felt her even breathing against his chest. She was asleep. He lay his head on the pillow and his mind went home to Ashgrove, where he knew in his heart he should be right now.
It had taken longer in London than he had supposed. He’d given two weeks to get her settled and now the second week was wearing on. At this rate Stephen would arrive at Ashgrove before he did and that would not do, not do at all. He fell into a troubled sleep.
By noon the next day they were entering the grounds of Meadowfields. “How do you know this property, Jack?” she asked.
“I came here as a lad. There was a hunt, as I recall.”
“How far is it from your family home?”
“ Half day's ride.”
“Do you recall if the owner was Latrouix?”
“I don’t and I don’t recall that name ever coming up at home. You may be spared a visit from my father,” he smiled and placed his hand on hers.
“Oh…the house!” Her hand went to her mouth when it came into view. “It’s very large. Oh, Jack, whatever will I do with it?”
“I hope you may live happily here.” He looked toward the big country house. “I do not believe it is much larger than your home in St. Georges. It is of a different style. You’ll soon find your feet.”
“I will with your help.”
“I may not be able to lend much help, Catty. I must be away and very soon if I’m to get home at all and I must, you know.”
Catty bit her lip. “Yes, of course.”
“I went by the Admiralty whilst in London and I’ve been given new orders. My time is very precious to me now. I’ve only three weeks and then I sail again. You do understand…?”
“Yes, I understand perfectly. I’m sorry to have taken so much of your time.”
“It has been time I wanted to spend with you.” He kissed her as the carriage pulled up in the circle before the house.
As they alighted from the carriage the staff all came out, clean and dressed in new uniforms, bright white mob caps shinning in the sun. The butler and housekeeper stood at the door to greet the master and his wife.
Jack spent two days acquainting himself with the property and inspecting along with one of the groundsmen. The stables needed repairs and he put a man on that, but by and large the property was in good order. It just needed attention. The chickens brought from London were now in their new coops and he talked to the man about a kitchen garden space. He was doing what he would have done had the property been his.
The village market fair produced two milk cows and three pigs and a man of work. One of the pigs was about to give birth. He sat down in the library and went over her expenses, satisfied everything was in good order.
“Am I disturbing you?” she asked from the door.
“No, not at all, my dear. I was just going over your expenses to date. I believe you are off to a good start, Catty.”
“You’ve done so much in such a short amount of time. I don’t know how to thank you.”
He smiled a little. “I will think of something. I’ve had a talk with your footman, James. He is to look after you in my absence.”
She walked over to him and he took her hands. “In your absence? Then you do mean to return?”
“Did you think you’d never see me again?” he asked softly. “I will write you, love, and when permitted time, I will come to see you. How could I not?” He pulled her to him and buried his face in her bosom.
She put her hand in the back of his hair and kissed the top of his head. “I love you so.” She hadn’t known for sure. “Jack, am I to be your mistress?”
He looked up at her. “I tried not to make it so but there it is. I’m sorry, Catty.”
“I’m not, not now. You once said I couldn’t have the whole of you. I understand how it is.” Her eyes filled. “But knowing I will see you again makes me so happy.”
“It makes me happy, too.” He kissed her gently. “Now have you got the house sorted out?”
Catty smiled, “Yes, and Glenda is to be my lady’s maid. That sets her apart and will allow her to be a sort of friend to me, someone I can talk to.”
“I shall tell Lofty, should he appear on my deck, that I have met his mother and that she is in good hands. Your housekeeper is to keep accounts which you must go over.”
“Yes. Jack, do you know the servants think you are their master, that you are my husband?”
A wry smile. “I got that from the footman. Yes, I do know.” He looked down a moment. “I’m afraid I did not tell him different. It is only for your protection, otherwise you might be taken advantage of. I want you to be safe and secure here, Lady Catherine.”
“Oh, I can’t get used to that, being addressed as M’Lady. I’m going to miss you so much.”
“Let us not talk of missing.” He rose from the chair and took her hand. “Shall I show you the garden I planned?”
Catty dismissed Glenda for the night. This night she needed no help getting out of her clothes. He would be gone by the time she woke in the morning. She unbuttoned his vest with trembling hands, not really believing this would be the last time, that he wouldn’t be there tomorrow night. She closed her eyes, fumbling the buttons, and he took her hands, kissed them and finished removing the vest.
“Don’t think about tomorrow, not tonight. Think of nothing but this moment, this moment when I love you, Catty, this moment when I want you.” He kissed her deeply and lovingly.
She watched his hands unbuttoning her dress and felt them slide inside, cupping her breasts. Her breath caught as he rubbed his thumbs over her nipples. She leaned into him, pulling his shirt up and flattening her palms on his back, running her hands over the familiar scars, feeling the muscles move as he slid her dress down over her hips. Her hands and fingers were storing up memory of the feel of him. The smell of him, her face against his chest. The taste of him. Her tongue trailed across his nipples. He unbuttoned his breeches, his manhood against her stomach, and moved her to the bed. He filled her time and time again until there was nothing left of them but sleep.
Jack woke with the first shaft of light that entered his bedroom. Taking care not to wake her, he eased from her side. He bathed and dressed quietly in the dressing room alcove, watching her all the time. Once he was ready, he stood by the bed for a while, wanting to touch her but knowing it would be best if he didn’t. He picked up his cutlass as he went down the stairs. James met him at the bottom of the steps. His breakfast was in the small withdrawing room.
He strapped on his cutlass, turning to take one last look around the familiar rooms, then walked out of the front door where the stable boy held his black stallion. He would ride it to his father’s estate and send it back with the boy who followed him. From there he would get a ride to a coaching inn and catch a coach to Ashgrove. Somewhere along the road his thoughts would turn from Catty to Sophie. From one life to another.
Catty woke much later, having been awake most of the night. Her arm went automatically to the empty space beside her, his body warmth long gone, the bed cold. She squeezed her eyes together and cried. Finally she pulled herself together and got up and moved through the connecting doors to her own bedroom where Glenda waited with a hot bath for her.
“He’s gone,” she said simply and stepped into the copper tub.
“Tis always hard when they leave,” Glenda replied.
“Why did you never marry Lofty’s father?”
“He were married already. Had a wife and little ones but he were something special to me.”
“Captain Aubrey is something special to me, too.”
“Yes, ma’am.”
“I don’t know when I’ll see him again. I’m not sure I can bear it.”
“Ye will, ma’am. That’s the way of it when ye be loving a man of the sea.”
“A man of the sea.” She leaned her head back while Glenda poured water over her hair to rinse. “I do love a man of the sea.”
“He be a good man, your Captain. He’s put things to rights here a’fore he left. Cook says there’s piglets in the pen.”
“Oh, I want to go and see them.” She sat up in the tub and reached for a towel.
And so began her life again.
Part 3 - Letters
Dearest Jack,
I received your letter to day . Oh ,what joy it brought me. To know that you are thinking of me as I think of you, that somewhere in the heavens our thoughts have met, perhaps embraced. I love you dearly and miss you daily.
I suppose by now you are at sea. I pray you have good strong winds to take you there and back to me. I am writing from the library, sitting at the desk where you sat. Some news: we now have nine little piglets. There were eleven born but two have since died. The black and white cow gives good milk and we now have butter and cream to spare.
I have been out riding with James in tow. I had no idea of the bountiful fruit trees in the orchards. The boy, Donny, is now picking apples to take to market along with the pears as I have gorged myself on these and cannot eat another. It is a beautiful home here and daily I find more to love. Remember the stream in the wood ? I followed it down through the meadow to the most delightful pool and waterfall. I thought to put my feet in the pool but James said it was too cool and that I would catch a fever. I’m afraid he has taken your directions as apply to me very seriously.
A few problems: the housekeeper, Mrs. Mason, has left. She said it was too isolated out here. She’s gone back to London. I’m not going to look for another as Cook has taken on the job of overseeing the housemaids as well as scullery and kitchen maid. I do like her, though she be gruff in her manner, she is a good woman. Peters is seeing to the accounts as his butler duties are lacking as of now. We’ve become quite informal since you left. The man of work you found, Diggety, has turned over the garden and planted winter vegetables so we shall not starve, my love.
Glenda thanks you for your word to Lofty on her behalf. I really don’t know what I would do without her. You know how devoted Judith and I were to each other and it is not the same with Glenda but she is a friend and someone I can talk to. I have written to Judith and hope to hear from her very soon. If word of the Adele has reached her she may think me gone from this world.
I will end this now with thoughts of you near me.
My dearest love,
Catty
14,Sept. 06
My Dearest Catty,
Your letter has found me at last and with it came the sweetness that is you. My thoughts of you have been rather bold of late. As you know there is precious little time alone on a man of war but those times are spent with you.
It is indeed good news about the pigs and the cow. You did not mention sheep and I did tell Fallon to see about obtaining a few and a ram. Ask him if he has done this. Also I paid for ducklings, six, I believe. Wigs has them in the village. They should be of an age very soon to collect. Perhaps they will enjoy your pool before gracing your table.
I am in Gibraltar taking on water and Stephen is about his business. I cannot say where we will sail from here but to say we shall be in warm waters. The weather has been fair and we have seen little action but enough to keep the men awake and alert when on duty.
Very happy to hear you get along with Glenda Pooley so well. It is good to have someone to talk to. If it weren’t for Stephen Maturin I should have gone mad years ago. Should you hear from Judith and Jean send my regards. I have heard some stories about the weather in those parts. Fierce storms have passed over the islands I do hope your Judith has not been affected by it.
Killick has brought coffee. How I wish you were here to share it with me. There was never enough time with you on land or sea and now I fear it may be spring before I am back. I will write you as often as I can, dear love.
J. A.
28, Sept. 06
Excerpts from letters:
…
…I did get a letter from Judith. She is doing very well and is with child. Jean sends his regards. They weathered the storms as being on the leeward side of the island offers some protection. She says the whole of Greenlees is planted with nutmeg. I must admit I think of Greenlees quite often, the view from the veranda of the sea. That same sea which you may as I write, be upon safely. The leaves have gone from the trees and the wood looks quite uninviting now. It has been cold over the house. James and Peters have kept the fires going in the small withdrawing room and my bedroom, the two rooms I inhabit in this huge mansion house.
I send my love to you.
Catty
10 Nov. 06
…And then the rains beat down on us with much intensity but we limped into port still afloat. We will be here for as long as it takes to make repairs and then we shall head home. I wish it were only a matter of a few miles, my love, for I miss you dearly.
I’ve had a letter from Sophie. She is with child and will deliver early summer. I hope this does not distress you but I thought you should know. Once back in England I shall go to Ashgrove first and then to Meadowfields and to you. I hope to find everything in good order. That was good news about the lambs and thank James for me about the footpath. Your letters are very special to me, Catty. Please do not stop writing. It is not always possible for me to post the replies in a timely manner. Chin up, my love. It won’t be long now.
With love and affection,
J. Aubrey
30 Jan, 07
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